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Jul03

Rewritten Headlines: Republicans to Homeless

by tonyd on July 3, 2015 at 12:01 am

RewrittenNewsDeskWerewolf

Presidential Election to be Choice of Two Republicans

Geeks Too Lazy to Move

Trump to Waste Money on Something Other Than an Ugly Casino

U.S. Still Pretending War on Terror is Working

July 4th Stars Early for Commuters

Women With Unrealistic Expectations Lured to One Website

Idiots on Facebook Don’t Get Joke

Man Punished for Nostalgia

People Living Too Long

Homeless Guy Insists on Staying Homeless

 

└ Tags: Brother Werewolf, comedy, current events, facebook, funny, geeks, headlines, homeless, humor, idiots, July 4th, News, nostalgia, old people, parody, Presidential Elections, Republicans, Rewritten Headlines, Super Frat, Tony DiGerolamo, Trump, War on Terror, women
Comments Off on Rewritten Headlines: Republicans to Homeless
Jul01

Twitter in Focus: Lake Bell

by tonyd on July 1, 2015 at 12:01 am

Hey Bros!

Welcome to Twitter in Focus where media comes to die.  Today’s contestant is Lake Bell.  She’s funny on Children’s Hospital, let’s see what she’s tweeting.

@lakebell

June 4th:  “WATCH TONIGHT: AXE COP at midnight to hear the wrath of my voice as “Axe Girl”! @FXXNetwork @AniDomiFXX”

Saw that episode.  It kicked much ass.

June 4th:  “FUN FACES ANYONE? ”

Oh, nice.  Simon Pegg movie.  This looks fun.

June 13th:  “WHAT ARE YOUR MANTRAS? And…. Go!@ManUpFilm (for mine: see “Man Up” and call me after)”

Never trust a man that laughs at his own jokes. 

June 17th:  “SEE SON SEVEN https://instagram.com/p/4C1tikF3OY/”

That looks like a still from a clown stalker movie.

June 20th:  “I AM A BIG FAT CAT #TheSecretLifeofPets @PetsMovie Here’s a peek: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i-80SGWfEjM …”

Nice.  Everyone’s in that movie.

June 24th:  “MARTOS GALLERY / this Thursday / 6-8pm / new works by Scott Campbell / 540 west 29th street #PROUDWIFEY https://instagram.com/p/4VKHcfl3EX/”

Aw, that’s nice.

June 26th:  “Spoiler: it’s not a comedy. ”

I don’t.  Maybe it’s all a wacky misunderstanding and it’s a sequel to Drillbit Taylor.

June 27th:  “Business as usual, bitches. #childrenshospital #nightshoot ”

Night shoot?  Then you must be able to drink during scenes.  Nice.

31 minutes ago:  “SISTER CODE: @1PhoebeJTonkin”

Dammit!  Still haven’t broken it.  But soon.  Someone on Twitter will talk.

Okay, let’s rate Lake’s tweets.  I give her an 8 for Mustness, a 9 for Insanity and a 10 for Style.  That’s an overall score off 9.  Follow Lake.

And if you have a suggestion for Twitter in Focus, email me here.

└ Tags: actress, Children's Hospital, comedian, comedy, funny, humor, Lake Bell, No Escape, Owen Wilson, Super Frat, The Secret Lives of Pets, Tony DiGerolamo, tweet, Twitter, Twitter in Focus
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Jun29

Movies You Missed: 47 Ronin

by tonyd on June 29, 2015 at 12:01 am

47Ronin2012Poster

“47Ronin2012Poster” by Source. Licensed under Fair use via Wikipedia – https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:47Ronin2012Poster.jpg#/media/File:47Ronin2012Poster.jpg

The moment I saw the trailer for 47 Ronin, I immediately thought of The Last Samurai with Tom Cruise and every other movie where a white guy shows the native culture how to do their native culture stuff.  Everything from Tarzan to Iron Fist always has some white, white dude becoming “the one” instead of, ya know, someone from the country where all this mystical stuff is happening.

47 Ronin actually doesn’t do that.  Keanu’s backstory is solid and make sense.  (He is part Asian, at least.)  And much like every classic Japanese tale told in the feudal age, it is a tragic love story about honor and redemption.  There are a couple of moments where the movie threatens to get overwhelmed by the CGI, but these moments are few.  Like Keanu’s performance, the movie is constantly try to understate what could be big.

Keanu plays Kai, a half-Asian man who was taken in by a kindly lord after escaping the forest where demons dwell.  Although he is raised by demons, he wants to live amongst humans despite the fact that they treat him lower than dirt.  He is in love with the lord’s daughter, Mika, but they can never be together because her station is so much higher than his.  When Kai’s lord is betrayed, he and many of his samurai are cast out as ronin (masterless samurai) and one year later, must fight to avenge their lord.  Add into the mix Japanese spirit monsters, excellent direction and Keanu’s performance (which is mostly ass kicking and no dialogue) and you have an epic tale that really slid under the radar when it was released.

Keanu Reeves has really been making some awesome actioners recently (see John Wick) and everyone (including me) who says “Dude!” every time he says a line, has really got to rethink this actor’s image.  See 47 Ronin.  Keanu is Ted no more.  (47 Ronin is currently on HBO on Demand.)

thumb

└ Tags: 47 Ronin, cinema, feudal, film, Iron Fist, Japanese, John Wick, Kai, Keanu Reeves, Mika, movie, Movies You Missed, rating, review, Super Frat, Tarzan, the Last Samurai, Tom Cruise, Tony DiGerolamo
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Jun28

Your Fratoscope: June 28, 2015

by tonyd on June 28, 2015 at 1:46 am

FratoScopeHeader

If your birthday is this week:  Your gambling addiction spins out of control and you’re force to let your bookie take your place at the surprise party.

Aries:  The stars say, get some exercise you fat fuck.

Taurus:  A 300-pound meter maid leaves something on the windshield of your car, unfortunately for you it’s a love letter.

Gemini:  Jack Black shows up to your party and overstays his welcome loudly.

Lemini:  Now that you finally gathered the courage to leave a love letter on your secret love’s car, how about losing some weight?

Cancer:  You will mistake the fire at your neighbors for smoke signals and sign a treaty with the Pawnee.

Leo:  You’ll wear that shirt you sleep in to a fancy dinner party so that everyone can enjoy your musk.

Virgo:  A new opportunity comes your way, but then you remember you already sold one kidney.

Libra:  This week, spend time with family.  They’re the easiest to borrow money from.

Scorpio:  You’ll explore a new kind of porn involving the 2nd knuckle, you sick, sick freak.

Sagittarius:  You cancel your trip to Tunisia because you hear the wifi is shit.

Capricorn:  You’ll be unable to resist saying, “Mooooo!’ driving past a dairy farm.

Aquarius:  You’ll be unable to resist saying, “Coooorn!” driving past a cornfield.

Pisces:  You’ll laugh way too hard at the name of this eatery.

 

└ Tags: Aquarius, Aries, astrology, Cancer, Capricorn, comedy, funny, future, Gemini, horoscope, humor, Lemini, Leo, Libra, Pisces, predictions, Sagittarius, Scorpio, signs, Super Frat, Taurus, Tony DiGerolamo, Virgo, Your Fratoscope, zodiac
Comments Off on Your Fratoscope: June 28, 2015
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