If your birthday is this week: Your roommate gets high and bakes you a really awesome cake. Awesome,that is, if you like cake made out of mostly baking soda. Aries: The gophers infesting your lawn will dance to Kenny Loggins […] ↓ Read the rest of this entry…
If your birthday is this week: Bill Clinton will come to your birthday party and it will be awesome. Just don’t leave him alone with your mom in the laundry room. Aries: The stars say, stop crying. Game of Thrones […] ↓ Read the rest of this entry…
If your birthday is this week: Your birthday cake will have a file in it. Guess you got mom’s cake by mistake. Aries: You’ll sneeze at a bad moment and ruin a haircut. Taurus: Your Dr. Who marathon lasts six […] ↓ Read the rest of this entry…
If your birthday is this week: You will receive unlimited data and messaging plan with your new fax machine. Aries: Your tribute to the troops catches fire, probably because you build it out of coffee cans half full of gasoline. […] ↓ Read the rest of this entry…