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Jun08

Rewritten Headlines: Homeland Security to Supersize

by tonyd on June 8, 2012 at 12:01 am

At the suggestion of one of our readers, I’d thought I’d try Rewritten Headlines in a different format.  Tell me what you think!

Congress Pisses Away More Borrowed Chinese Money

CDC: Stalking Teens for Shit We All Know

Obama Not a Great Diplomat

Poor People No Longer Issued Credit

Government Targets Next Famous Black Person for Imprisonment

NASA No Longer Cares If You’re Crushed Into Oblivion

Rich Guy Raises More Money That Most Powerful Man in World

Website For Unemployed People Wonders Why It Has Problems

New York City Hates Fat People

└ Tags: CDC, Chinese, comedy, Congress, funny, Homeland Security, humor, Lauren Hill, Linkedin, money, NASA, New York, Obama, Pakistan, parody, Rewritten Headlines, Rewritten News, Romney, soda, Super Frat, supersize, taxes, teens, texting, Tony DiGerolamo
Comments Off on Rewritten Headlines: Homeland Security to Supersize
Jun06

Twitter in Focus: Jim Florentine

by tonyd on June 6, 2012 at 12:01 am

Hey Bros!

Welcome to Twitter in Focus where media comes to die.  Today’s contestant is probably best known for doing the voice of Special Ed on Crank Yankers, click your mouse’s for comedian Jim Florentine.

@MrJimFlorentine

May 22nd:  “Check out the latest episode of The Full Hoon I co host on the Car And Driver Youtube channel. http://youtu.be/gyWIcG0uOkA”

Nice.  Could use a puppet, but still nice.

May 23rd:  “New Six Feet Under CD Undead @sixfeetofficial is their best one yet! Sick, demented lyrics! It’s #5 on Metal Itunes!”

I had no idea the cast of that show had a band.  Gotta check it out.

May 24th:  “Check out the new @Slash CD Apocalyptic Love. Great hard rock songs. @MylesKennedy nailing it on the vocals!”

Metal.

May 24th:  “6/16 Harpos Detroit, Mi. Comedy Metal Road Show w Jim F, Don J, n Ed Trunk. A night of Comedy, Metal, n Music Trivia. http://Harposconcerttheatre.com”

Doing comedy in front of metal fans.  You are a brave man, Jim.

May 24th:  “6/15 Cubby Bear Chicago, IL Comedy Metal Road Show w Jim F, Don J, n Ed Trunk. A night of Comedy, Metal, n Music Trivia http://Cubbybear.com”

It’s like the Blue Collar Comedy tour only not shitty and with better music.

May 25th:  “Saw Stryper @stryperband w Richard Christie @cwotd and @1337Ryan. Great show! Wanna thank @michaelhsweet and the boys for a great time.”

Wait a minute?  Is that Christian Metal!?

May 28th:  “I’ll be interviewed during 1p @Mets game today by @KBurkhardtSNY to promote season premiere of my new show @BeerMoneyonSNY right after game!”

You must be a happy Mets fan after this.

May 28th:  “Just watched 2 great Bobcat Goldthwait directed movies. God Bless America and Worlds Greatest Dad. He also did the classic Windy City Heat.”

I saw Windy City Heat and that was pretty fucking brilliant.

May 29th:  “Check out the latest episode of The Full Hoon that I co host on Car And Driver Magazine’s Youtube channel. http://youtu.be/-_LloE7keB8”

You are busy, Jim.  Good to see you workin’.

May 29th:  “Less then one month away @realdonjamieson and I are opening for Metallica at Orion Fest in AC. #FuckingInsane!”

I’ve always liked this Metallica song. (Shh!  Don’t tell them it’s free on Youtube!)

May 30th:  “Congrats to @Slash @MylesKennedy and the Conspirators for the debut at #4 on the Billboard Charts this week!”

Damn, someone loves metal.

May 30th:  “My Son just hit his terrible two’s. On my way to get a vasectomy.”

Too late now.

7 hours ago:  “Here is a link for tix to my One Man Show in NYC Wed. June 13 part of NYC Underground Comedy Fest. http://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/220711”

New York bros, take notice. He’s funny.

6 hours ago:  “Got a few minutes in airport. Any questions. Keep them short so I can retweet and respond. Please no questions about my big dick.”

And so went a pretty long Q&A with the fans.  Nice.

Okay, let’s rate Jim’s tweets.  Certainly very responsive to fans.  Good mix of plugs and other stuff.  I give Jim an 8 for Style, an 8 for Insanity and a 10 for Mustness.  That’s an overall score of 9.  Yay!  Follow Jim.

And if you have a suggestion for Twitter in Focus, email us here.

└ Tags: comedian, comedy, Crank Yankers, funny, humor, Jim Florentine, stand up, Super Frat, Tony DiGerolamo, tweets, Twitter, Twitter in Focus
Comments Off on Twitter in Focus: Jim Florentine
Jun04

What I’d Like to See Happen: Comic Book Conventions

by tonyd on June 4, 2012 at 12:01 am

I managed to snag myself a free pass to Wizard World Philadelphia.  It wasn’t the end of comic book conventions, but you can definitely see the end from there.  That’s not to pick on Wizard World.  I’ve have good and bad experiences with them.  Certainly, I wouldn’t run a business as they do, but to each his own.

The problem with comic book conventions is that the big ones that have survived are not about comic books.  There’s just not enough interest in print comic books in the US.  There, I said it.  In Japan comic books are a billion dollar industry, but that’s party because a big percentage of that is porn and what isn’t porn isn’t superheroes.  There’s a wide swath of interest put in comic books in Japan and they’re really cheap, big comics.

U.S. print comics have become a loss leader for movie development or an adjunct to those of us who moved on to webcomics.  The comic book conventions are supposed to be about catering to the fans of this medium, not just to major trademarks.  That means the focus needs to be on the creators and the comics, not the product developed based on that.  And if you are going to cover the other product, well there should be added respect show to the medium from which it originates. and especially the creators.

Wizard World has pretty much turned into an autograph convention and there’s nothing wrong with that.  It’s actually good they finally expanded into film because they had screenings to go see.  Plus they now regularly invite fan clubs to these things.  But the artist alley is shrinking.  I don’t see it staying.  I think within 2 years, it will just be absorbed into another section of the con.  Quite frankly, I’d be surprised if Wizard kept the name “Comic Con”.  It would probably be more appropriate to call it a “Pop Culture Con”.

But here’s What I’d Like to See Happen:

There is no going back to the “good ol’ days” of big comic book cons.  (Not that they were all that “good” to begin with, but at least they focused on the medium.)  Comic book conventions need to get away from these pop culture extravaganzas where creators and the comics don’t get attention.  Better to be in a smaller, hotel con and have the focus than get lost in the maze on the convention floor.  I also think Sci-Fi Fantasy Cons are a better fit, since they tend to focus on stories and characters and creators, rather than just popular trends.  (Not that there isn’t some focus there.)

I’d like to see Wizard World get out of comics.  I wish them well, but as I’ve always said, “If you want to make money, get out of comics.”  There’s the door Wizard.  Have a nice life selling autograph pictures.  Not my thing, but hey, 2000 people lined up to see the actor that played Thor, so who am I to judge?

Webcomics are the future and comic book fans need to embrace that.  If there’s anything you need to piggyback on, webcomics is the thing.  First, webcomic fans like comic books.  They’re certainly not against them.  And since webcomic fans are only in it for the reading, art and story, there’s no collectible aspect to get in the way.  Now, as a comic book dealer, you’d have to change up your sales pitch somewhat.  You’d have to focus on your product being a good read, rather than a valuable collectible, but certainly there are some retailers that can do this.  Webcomic conventions are still small and they would welcome the income that comic book dealers would bring.  You couldn’t have very many, but downsizing is going to happen, no matter how you look at it.  It’s about quality, not quantity.

Silver Age, Golden Age and big collectible guys, they’re already moving on to antique-type conventions or their own shows.  That’s where they need to be.  It’s an older crowd.  Big ticket items.  With the Internet, why would someone that’s going to spend five grand on one comic do it on the floor of a con?  There’s noise, fans, not to mention food—  These transactions should be in a much more subdued arena or ones strictly focused on antiques.

Let’s get back to our roots, comic book people.  Small shows inside of hotel conference rooms, VFW halls or other places where you can spend time, relax, chat with creators and walk through the doors for free.  Let’s slash our overhead so that comic book conventions will be free or really cheap to walk in the door.  Let the big shows be about big things: movies, TV and celebrities.  The webcomic world is building a great community of fans of the medium you love.  Let’s build on that community and not get caught up in this collectible nonsense or, God forbid, Avengers cologne.   And hey, I loved the Avengers movie.  Make the comic that good and really cheap and I’ll read it.

But let’s not kill ourselves trying to prop up these characters out of some kind of misguided loyalty to “comics”.  The comics community should be about the medium and the creators.  And that’s what I would like to see emphasized.

Copyright 2012
└ Tags: antiques, artist, artist alley, business, cologne, comic book conventions, comic con, cons, convention center, creators, Golden Age, hotel, Japan, opinion, Pop Culture Con, rant, Silver Age, Super Frat, The Avengers, Tony DiGerolamo, U.S., US, VWF hall, webcomics, What I'd Like to See Happen, Wizard World
Comments Off on What I’d Like to See Happen: Comic Book Conventions
Jun03

Your Fratoscope: June 3, 2012

by tonyd on June 3, 2012 at 12:01 am

If your birthday is this week:   You will drop your nachos at the baseball game on the biker gang member on the seat in front of you.  Fortunately, you’ll have time to hand your empty plate to your 6 year-old niece in the seat next to you.

Aries:  You will have an erotic dream that will be interrupted by a commercial for carpet store.

Taurus:  Charleton Heston will come to you in a dream and ask you to water his lawn.  When you explain that he doesn’t own that lawn anymore, he threatens you a gunpoint.  Better do it.

Gemini:  This week, watch out for unexplained toast.

Lemini:  Your experiment finally breaks free and starts trashing the city.  Fortunately, you’re prepared and you’ll be in Mexico in your back up lab before the cops trace it back to you.

Cancer:   The stars say, you will discover that the guy that rips out your kitchen promising to remodel it on his TV show, doesn’t really have a TV show or a contractor license.

Leo:  Finally, buying all those lottery tickets pays off: the clerk at the minimart feels so badly you pissed away your life savings, he gives you a soda.

Virgo:  You will be hired by a Giant Soda Lobby to make sure Mayor Bloomberg’s law doesn’t come a reality.  You’ll be paid well, but all that soda you drink eventually gives you diabetes.

Libra:  You’ll be spending a lot of time outside this week, so enjoy it.  It won’t last long, the guards eventually notice you’re gone.

Scorpio:  While watching an extremely explicit porno, you’ll recognize the couch the three main characters are on.  No wonder it was such a deal on Craigslist.

Sagittarius:  Superman will save the plane that you’re on from crashing, but then he’ll drop it in a lake after you try to hit on that hot female reporter in the seat next to you.  Worth it.

Capricorn:  Your best friend will ask you to help get rid of a body.  After several arduous hours of chopping, wrapping and cleaning up blood, you eventually get rid of it.  When you ask your roommate why he did it, he’ll say that he just assumed you killed him.

Aquarius:  Your exterminator will get pulled into the darkest part of your basement by a group of swarming insects.  On the upside, no bill.

Pisces:  Your dog will forge your signature to co-sign for a car loan, but she gets a great group rate from an online car insurance company and ends up saving you money.

└ Tags: 2012, Aquarius, Aries, astrology, birthday, Cancer, Capricorn, comedy, frat boy, funny, Gemini, horoscope, humor, June 4, Lemini, Leo, Libra, parody, Pisces, predictions, psychic, Sagittarius, Scorpio, Super Frat, Taurus, Tony DiGerolamo, Virgo, Your Fratoscope, zodiac
Comments Off on Your Fratoscope: June 3, 2012
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