Miss the parade? Tony D has the highlights!
Miss the parade? Tony D has the highlights!
Welcome to the Rewritten News! Let’s face it, you’re sleepy from eating turkey leftovers. You don’t have time to read entire articles, let the Rewritten News help.
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Rewritten: University of Hawaii Not Involved with Child Molestation
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Real: Stock Slides as Government Lowers Growth Estimate
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Rewritten: Mars May Be Full of Farts
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Rewritten: Obvious News Story Confirms Hippie Beliefs
Hey Bros!
Welcome to Twitter in Focus where media comes to die! This week’s contestant is comedian, Chris Rock. Let’s check out his tweets.
June 12th: “About to do our 100th show then it’s off to the Motherfuckin Tony awards.”
What the Hell is Chris Rock doing at the Tonys?
June 13th: “And the best musical goes to…. http://say.ly/lzTpvj”
Funny and so awesome the South Park guys won.
June 29th: “Weird show last night. I blew more lines than Rick James. Super director Richard Linklater was in the house. I’m g… http://say.ly/Bgcsmc”
Aw, damn the link is broken. This tweet has everything. Behind the scenes, a photo. If only it wasn’t 6 months old.
July 3rd: “With Rick Rubin listening to the new Chili Peppers album. I’m in heaven.”
Rubin is the man.
July 6th: “The great James Earl Jones in the house. http://say.ly/OwQtoK”
Damn Chris, you know everyone.
July 17: “ITS OVER. The Motherf**ker with the hat has ended its broadway run. I wanna thank everybody that came by and saw the play. Now in the words of jay z its on to the next one.”
Ah, well. You can always turn it into a movie.
August 5th: “Just left the Presidents birthday party at the White House. Herbie Hancock played, Stevie Wonder sang and yes they did the electric slide. A great night.”
Wow, no wonder you don’t have time to tweet.
August 10th: “Tickets still available. http://say.ly/AsmzYw”
You’re playing the Colloseum? Wait! Don’t do the lion show!
August 19th: “In my trailer watching Woody Allen movies. http://say.ly/ejJCck”
Not too shabby.
August 29th: “Got a long flight back. thank god I have three episodes of Louie and the new peppers album. @louisck”
Nice. That one with Doug Stanhope was the best.
September 11th: “http://911relief.robinhood.org/chris-rock#letters”
Wow. Very generous.
September 12th: “I’m in. http://say.ly/QpVHy6”
Yeah, it’s like the only reason to watch the Golden Globes is to see Ricky tear everyone apart.
October 6th: “Jackson Pollock and I at Moma today. http://say.ly/BkrOK0”
Celebrities, Rome, museum— Everything’s coming up Chris!
October 12th: “A man just told me he loved me in Trading Places and Rush Hour.”
What an idiot. Everyone knows Trading Places was way better.
October 18th: “Got on stage last night for the first time in a long time. Felt good.”
He’s back! It’s like following Chris’s whole year.
October 21st: “SA DA TAY http://say.ly/mJRSXJ”
I still can’t believe Louis CK directed that.
October 28th: “Could happen… http://say.ly/woeUTO”
I see buddy cop movie!
November 2nd: “Go check out the funny @wkamaubell this Friday in LA. http://say.ly/gNEWmJ”
Wow, some really good writers. Hope it comes East.
November 2nd: “No football durring the week, World Series is over I really miss the NBA. I don’t care who wins cause right now I’m losing.”
Occupy the Court!
November 8th: “About 20 summers ago Heavy took me out on the road as his opening act. Best time of my life. Really gonna miss him. http://say.ly/xCzY2A”
Yeah, that was sad to hear. I remember him. I did not know he was in Tower Heist.
Okay, let’s rate Chris’s tweets. Obviously, he’s very busy, but consistent. I give him a 6 for Mustness. He’s really living the life, but not in a crazy way, so I give him a 6 for Insanity. But 10 for Style all the way. What a genuine tweeter. That’s like a 7.3, but I’m rounding it up to 9 because this is a Twitter account totally worth following.
And if you have a suggestion for Twitter in Focus, email us here.
Confusing movie
Great cast, but extremely long
Tom Cruise waves his dick
Addanac City
A Dog’s Life
Adriana Game Over
Ahoy Earth
Art of Webcomics
Bad Oranges
Bad Pudding

Beta Male
Between the Realms
Black Tail and Marz
Bunny Wiggins
Capes and Babes
Cat and Cat Comics
Center Lane
Champion City Comics
City Folk, The Webcomic
Company Man
Convenience Store Diet
Corpse Run Comics

Crooked Frame Comics
Crunchy Bunches
Dairy Boy Comics
Damn Heroes
Destroyed by Robots
Dodgy Comics
Doug Lefler
Druid City
Fart Related Comics
Fatherhood. Badly Doodled
The Flavor Razor
Frownland
The Funnicks
Game Cupid
Games Finder
Game Period
Gerbil with a Jetpack
Giving the Devil Her Due
H.I.T.
The Hero Business
Hit Girlz
I, Mummy
Java Jaguar
Ker-Bop
Kick Man

Krrobar.com
LaSalle’s Legacy
Legacy Control
Modest Medusa
Murdercake
Mythdirection
Ninja and Pirate
The Other End
OutwitTrade
Plan C
QWERTYvsDvorak
Robot Friday
Romantically Apocalyptic
SCAPULA
Skitter
Skroode
Sluggy Freelance
Sparkshooter
Spirits of Suburbia
StocktonCon
SuperBud
Tangent Artists
Teaspoon Comics
The Devil’s Panties
The Dreamcatcher
The System
The Tales of Lev
Validation

Vinnie the Vampire
Waystone
Wayward Raven
Winter of Discontent
Woo Hooligan!
Yesterday’s Popcorn
Zombie Boy Comics
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