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Aug30

Rewritten Headlines: China to Fast Food Workers

by tonyd on August 30, 2013 at 12:01 am

Communist Country Warns Country That Tortures Not to Bomb Oppressive Country

More Gay People to Get Audited

Worst Break Up Ever

Kids in High School Still Acting Like Assholes

NJ Can’t Give Enough Tickets in Own State

Broken Marriage Opportunity for Reporter Pun

Enormous Interplanetary Dick Joke in Space

Scientist Begin Building Mini-Me’s

U.S. May Be Cool

Guys Who Can’t Make Tacos or Talk Through Drive Thru Headset Want More Pay

└ Tags: Brain, China, Clint Eastwood, comedy, current events, fast food, funny, gay, headlines, high school, humor, IRS, Kim Jong Ill, legalization, marijuana, News, NJ, pay, Rewritten Headlines, Rewritten News, stem cells, suicide, Super Frat, Syria, tickets, Tony DiGerolamo, trojan, U.S.
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Aug28

Twitter in Focus: Nathan Fielder

by tonyd on August 28, 2013 at 12:01 am

Hey Bros!

Welcome to Twitter in Focus where media comes to die!

Today’s contestant is Nathan Fielder, of Comedy Central’s Nathan for You.  He’s funny on the show, let’s see if he’s funny in his tweets.

@nathanfielder

July 21st:  “Always awkward when you try to greet an old lady with a cheek kiss and then they die before you can land it.”

Oh, God, yeah.  So awkward.

July 23rd:  “Never hurts to read the fine print pic.twitter.com/RZ4snkqZuj”

The ninja turtles had to invest their money into something after their chain of turtle-themed pizza parlors went under.

July 28th:  “Cheapest place to buy S1 of Nathan For You right now is itunes in SD for $11.99. HD is $8 more, which is fair. http://bit.ly/1dKywT1”

I liked this show.  I didn’t think Comedy Central really gave it a good time slot.

August 3rd:  “MUA is one of the strangest things Ive seen. Its a massage so hard you have to be drugged unconscious for it. No joke http://youtu.be/GMiv7prKD7E”

Oh, no.  That’s what the frat brothers said would happen.  I still have nightmares about what they put in my mouth.

August 4th:  “I want to buy all the women all the houses”

Sexist Monopoly is so much more interesting than regular Monopoly.

August 9th:  “Fun way to kill an hour: Walk into any 7-11 with an unopened bag of Doritos then try to convince the clerk that they’re yours.”

Or better yet, walk in and eat a bag of Doritos, then insist that your stomach contents are your property.

August 11th:  “Conversation tip: have stock lines prepared to fill silences like “Where did you buy your shirt” or “Lets talk about horses now.””

I like to put the onus on the other person by saying, “I’ll bet you have a great way to jump start this conversation!”

August 14th:  “Quickly flexing before a woman touches my arm is my best move.”

Definitely better than whipping it out.

August 19th:  “I’ve spent the last 5 minutes deciding if I should give my location to the Inception app pic.twitter.com/C92WQUt0o5”

Do it.  Plus there’s an app inside the app, but your indecision will only be half as long.

But the unanswered question, is Nathan Fielder related to character actor, John Fielder?  We may never know.  Okay, let’s rate Nathan’s tweets.  Not bad.  Decent amount of material.  Would love to hear some more behind-the-scene stuff and I cut an exchange with a fan.  I give him a 6 for Insanity, an 8 for Mustness and a 9 for Style.  That’s an overall score of 7.6.  Hey, twitter is free.  Follow Nathan.

And if you have a suggestion for Twitter in Focus, email us here.

 

└ Tags: App, comedian, comedy, Comedy Central, funny, humor, Inception, John Fielder, Nathan Fielder, Nathan for You, Super Frat, television, Tony DiGerolamo, tweet, Twitter, Twitter in Focus
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Aug26

Movies You Missed: Dredd

by tonyd on August 26, 2013 at 12:01 am

Based on the UK’s most popular comic, Dredd takes another stab at the Judge Dredd character without Slyvester Stallone and Rob Schneider.  Unlike the previous movie, this one does not attempt to jam 200 issues of the comic into two hours of movie.  And unlike the previous movie, this one doesn’t try to add comic relief.

Dredd captures the dystopian future of the comic books.  Karl Urban makes an excellent Dredd and never takes off the helmet.  Olivia Thrilby plays Judge Anderson and does a decent job of playing the rookie/psychic.  Wisely, screenwriter Alex Garland keeps the action confined to just one of the buildings of Mega City 1, as Dredd and Anderson get trapped there by a drug gang.  Peter Travis’ direction captures the claustrophobic atmosphere of Mega City.

The only thing missing from the comic is the colorful nicknames and images of the villains, which were sometimes over the top.  Garland and Travis keep the movie more grounded and don’t tempt fate by taking into territory that would undermine the premise.  Still, Dredd strikes a little too close to home, making the Judges seem almost possible.

Dredd is what the first Judge Dredd movie should’ve been and pays great homage to the comic.  It’s on Netflix now and is definitely worth a click.  See it, bros.

└ Tags: Alex Garland, cinema, comic book, Dredd, film, Judge Dredd, Keith Urban, movie, Movies You Missed, Olivia Thrilby, Peter Travis, Rob Schneider, Slyvester Stallone, Super Frat, Tony DiGerolamo, UK
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Aug25

Your Fratoscope: August 25, 2013

by tonyd on August 25, 2013 at 12:01 am

If your birthday is this week:  Taylor Swift will write a song about you.  Unfortunately, it about how she hit you with her car.

Aries:  You will discover that your frat is like your family: they borrow money and never pay it back.

Taurus:  You will find out that water park you used to visit as a kid was actually a rainy junkyard full of old sewer pipes.

Gemini:  The band, One Direction, will have their tour bus break down in front of your place, but fortunately you call the cops and they beat the shit out of them.

Lemini:  Your tour bus will break down in front of some dude’s house.  He’ll suggest you start pushing and then get on his phone.

Cancer:  You’ll be the only tourist visiting San Diego that isn’t sexually harassed by the former mayor.

Leo:  The stars say, what the fuck are you doing with your life?  Seriously?  The stars say, get your shit in gear.

Virgo:  You will realize that during your Breaking Bad viewing party, that actually serving meth to guests goes too far.

Libra:  This week, someone will fill your bathtub full of Pokemon balls.

Scorpio:  Your “scratch n’ sniff” pornography idea sells only to a select group of fetishists.

Sagittarius:  You will find that it’s too late to clean off your bed, the mushrooms have taken hold.

Capricorn:  You will arrive at college a week early and discover your room full of dorm gnomes getting high.

Aquarius:  The NSA has classified your fortune for this week.  It advises you to be surprised like a real American.

Pisces:  Your typos get out of hand this week as gpoiyufsdh dfh3gyy *&^34,

└ Tags: American, Aquarius, Aries, Breaking Bad, Cancer, Capricorn, college, comedy, cops, dorm, funny, Gemini, gnomes, humor, Lemini, Leo, Libra, mayor, NSA, One Direction, parody, Pisces, Sagittarius, San Diego, satire, Scorpio, sexual harrassment, Super Frat, Taurus, Tony DiGerolamo, Virgo, Your Fratoscope
Comments Off on Your Fratoscope: August 25, 2013
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