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Get Bitter Laid
Bitter's Chick
Your Cheatin' Goth
The Apology
Freshmen Have Their Uses
The Campus Handy
Adviser in Getting Laid
Buddy Virus Returns
Romance is Dead
We Hate Your Girlfriend
The Cycle of College
Love or Ice Cream?
Not That Much of a Bro
Goth Pledge
Say It With Pants
Colorado Road Trip
Pot Bar
Determined Depression
College Brain Surgery
A Dick in Time
Nov06

Rewritten Headlines: Sanders to Tiger

by tonyd on November 6, 2015 at 12:01 am

RewrittenNewsDeskWerewolf

Socialist Will Touch Your Junk

Bureaucrat Gives Up Doing Job

Evil Organization Corrupts Young

Burglar Drops In

Man has a— Oh, Dear God! Holy shit!

Tony D Banned From Buses and Trains

News Company Doing Everything But Reporting News Well

Bush Banned

Maintenance Finally Does Job

Convent Hogging All of God’s Attention

Not Grrrrreat

 

└ Tags: Bernie Sanders, burglar, Bush, comedy, convent, funny, Goldman Sachs, gum wall, humor, News, nuns, NYT, Obama, Rewritten Headlines, Rewritten News, snoring, Super Frat, tapeworm, tiger, Tony DiGerolamo, underwear
1 Comment
Nov04

Twitter in Focus: Lena Headey

by tonyd on November 4, 2015 at 1:10 am

Hey Bros!

Welcome to Twitter in Focus where media comes to die!  Today’s contestant is the evil queen herself, Lena Headey of Game of Thrones.  Let’s see what she’s tweeting.

@IAMLenaHeadey

October 26th:  “One more thing while I’m on the subject.. You’re going to have shitty bastard days .. BUT .. BUT you’re going to be SO OK”

Inspiring words for the fans.

October 26th:  “Breathing and being kind to your individual glorious self is a strong muthafucking ally for this life .. DONEZO”

So not the queen’s words.  She’d probably say something like, “I’m going to murder you and eat your children.”

October 26th:  “Also .. Stop comparing .. Whatever it is .. WASTE OF ENERGY.”

True.  Good advice.

October 27th:  “pic.twitter.com/W0NJHSppSL”

Well, unless you’re in a coma.  Although I guess that is technically a good day for someone in a coma.

October 27th:  “pic.twitter.com/0FMWYU9sQH”

Inspiring, but vague.

October 27th:  “pic.twitter.com/KqtQG5udwN”

Ha!  Nice.

October 27th:  “Should raise a little grin that one”

Smiling.  Also inspiring advice.

October 27th:  “I sadly missed @elaxora #primeministernomorescars exhibition yesterday on #intersexawarenessday”

Ooookay.  No idea.

October 27th:  “world-arts.com/news/full.asp?news=artist-ela-xora-launches-provocative-new-exhibitions-drawing-attention-of-intersex-abuse …”

Ooooh, now I get it.  Yep.  Let’s do that.

October 31st:  “Happy weeny”

Very English.

21 hours ago:  “You will achieve”

I will!  I’m inspired…

To finish this TIF.  Let’s rate Queen Lena.  I give her an 8 for Mustness, a 9 for Insanity and a 10 for Style.  That’s an overall score of 9.  Follow the Queen.

And if you have a suggestion for Twitter in Focus, email me here.

└ Tags: actress, art, comedy, funny, Game of Thrones, humor, intesex, Lena Headey, queen, Super Frat, Tony DiGerolamo, Twitter in Focus
1 Comment
Nov02

Ten Things I Expect to be Leftovers at Halloween

by tonyd on November 2, 2015 at 1:28 am

SF Tony Avatar

  1.  Bit O’ Honey
  2. Mary Janes
  3. Candy Corn
  4. Tootsie Rolls
  5. Good n’ Plenty
  6. Wax Lips
  7. Circus Peanuts
  8. Smarties
  9. Pixie Stix
  10. Wax Bottles  (wax is not a food!)
└ Tags: Bit O' Honey, candy, Candy Corn, Circus Peanuts, comedy, funny, Good n' Plenty, Halloween, humor, leftovers, list, Mary Jane, Pixie Stix, Smarties, Super Frat, Ten Things I Expect, Tony DiGerolamo, Tootsie Rolls, Wax Bottles, wax lips
1 Comment
Nov01

Your Fratoscope: November 1, 2015

by tonyd on November 1, 2015 at 12:01 am

FratoScopeHeader

If your birthday is this week:  You will discover that your heart-shaped birthday cake is a leftover from Valentine’s Day 2013.

Aries:  Yesterday, giving candy out was cool, today, out of your van, it’s just creepy.

Taurus:  You will find true lust behind a gas station dumpster.

Gemini: The stars say, make your own way in life because that cult leader you follow is mentally ill.

Lemini:  Scientists will offer you $50 if you allow them to study why you’re such a loser.

Cancer:  The YouTube video of you handing out candy to kids on Halloween, will be taken down for too many swears.

Leo:  The TSA guy that feels you up, turns out to be a guy in costume from the previous day.

Virgo:  You will host a night of trivia about MacGyver that ends in a fistfight.

Libra:  This week, the tables will turn and now you’ll be the only person in class with pants on.

Scorpio:  Someone will borrow your nipple clamps and return them unwashed.

Sagittarius:  Your prank fires aren’t really pranks if you take money to set them.

Capricorn:  The ghost of Patrick Swayze will insist you don’t know how to cook wings the proper way.

Aquarius:  You will know your lamb is undercooked when it gets up and runs away.

Pisces:  The stars say, leave some room for desert because you enjoy an arid climate and don’t know how to spell desert.

└ Tags: astrology, Cancer, Capricorn, comedy, frat boy, funny, Gemini, horoscope, humor, Lemini, Leo, Libra, Pisces, predictions, psychic, Sagittarius, Scorpio, signs, Super Frat, Taurus, Tony DiGerolamo, Virgo, Your Fratoscope, zodiac
1 Comment
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