This week, me and the Missus went to Smithville. Look for a brief cameo of the Missus at the end.
This week, me and the Missus went to Smithville. Look for a brief cameo of the Missus at the end.
If your birthday is this week: Stop celebrating. It’s Memorial Day, you selfish a-hole. People died!
Aries: You nude Memorial Day cookout will be under attended, probably because you didn’t manscape.
Taurus: The stars say, God damn its hot. You’ll be sweating your balls off if you go outside, that much the stars know.
Gemini: A friend will return a favor. Guess you should’ve never borrowed that bucket of goat shit.
Lemini: This week, you’ll have sex with your crazy ex girlfriend. That’ll seem like a good idea until her PTSD kicks in.
Cancer: The stars don’t want to ruin the surprise, but buckle your seatbelt this week.
Leo: You won’t win the TV cooking show, but the oven explosion you cause makes it the highest rated episode ever.
Virgo: You will discover why it’s a bad idea to drink before driving a float in a Memorial Day parade.
Libra: This week, Starbucks will name a coffee after you. It’s called, Mocha Douchecino.
Scorpio: You will support the troops in your own way. Mostly by have sex with them.
Sagittarius: You will support the troops in your own way. Mostly by making them pudding.
Capricorn: You won’t support the troops at all, will ya, Commie?
Aquarius: This week, you’ll get a haircut so bad it will scare small pets and children.
Pisces: You’ll have a very boring week, except when the meteor hits.
Okay, short review, no, it doesn’t live up to the first movie. Falls way short. You’re not going to wait for the rental, but you probably should. Here’s what happened in the movie (spoilers) and here’s what I think went wrong.
First, as you probably know from the trailer, Ed Helms (Stu) is getting married to a woman in Thailand. This is the excuse for the movie to go to Bangkok. Fine, seems like a good place to up the ante.
Unfortunately, right out the gate Zack Galifianakis does the same thing he did in Due Date with Robert Downey, Jr.. He acts like a complete jackass from the moment he comes onto the screen. In the first Hangover, his character, Allen, was endearing. Sure, he was hapless and annoying, but he was family so he had to be a part of the group. Bradley Cooper (Phil) and Ed Helms take an instant dislike to him, but because he’s awkward, not obnoxious.
Phillips first wastes time by having scenes leading up to Allen going on the trip. We know he’s going, so they are pretty pointless. Allen has this weird scene where he demands that his mother bring him a cupcake and he’s a dick about it. Where’s nice Allen?
So anyway, they go to Thailand. Stu is very wary. And when they decide to go to the beach to have a drink, Phil even mentions that the beers he got are sealed. Who the fuck is out to poison them now? What Allen did the first time was an accident anyway. He meant to put in Ecstasy.
Anyhow, it happens again. Unfortunately, director Todd Phillips and and the screenwriters try too hard to pay homage to the first movie. The events in that felt random. Here they feel forced. How they get drugged is just stupid and unbelievable, in my view.
Ken Jeong is, as always, genius. He and Ed Helms kickass and almost carry the movie. Bradley Cooper does okay. Unfortunately, Alan is so annoying through most of the story, you wonder why they don’t just abandon him. It’s not as bad as Due Date, but its close.
There are also moments of reality that just get glossed over. One of the characters gets severely maimed in a way that he might not be able to do his life-long job anymore. Apparently, it’s just not that big a deal. Paul Giamatti is wasted in a role.
Where are the Rob Riggle characters? The movie desperately needed them. It feels so contrived by the end, you’re just glad its over. What a shame. This could’ve been good. It’s merely watchable and really, only if you’re a fan of the first movie. My theory is, the movie was so popular, like the Sopranos, it already became a victim of its own success. There were rumors about Mel Gibson or Bill Clinton appearing, which would’ve been awesome. The movie definitely need some more celebrities. Not big names, just some comic actors to throw in the mix and have weird encounters with. Jeffrey Tambor is hilarious, but he’s only in it for a minute.
Sadly, this is a rental, in my book. I give it 4.5 keggers. Just above Bridesmaids. But really, after the first one, that’s such a drop. I really would’ve rather watched the first one again.
Thanks a lot, Hollywood marketing machine, for again heightening my expectations about one movie, but actually delivering another. Bridesmaids was advertised as a female version of The Hangover, which would’ve been awesome. Instead, it’s a romantic comedy kind of disguised as a female version of The Hangover.
Dammit, I’m so pissed! The cast was there! Wendie McLendon-Covey (Clementine from Reno 911!), Ellie Klemper (Erin from the Office) and Kristen Wiig. Plus some of the supporting cast of Workaholics. Oh, this could’ve been good. Funny.
The basic premise, Kristen Wiig’s best friend is getting married, while Kristen’s life is falling apart, she has to be the Maid of Honor. Parts of the movie are awesome. There’s a fun scene in a bridal shop. Covey and Klemper are spot on in every scene they’re in, but Wiig is in most of the scenes. She carries some of the movie, but the romantic comedy parts just suck. It’s not that they’re bad, it’s who cares? Wiig’s boyfriend is so obviously a douche and Wiig’s potential new boyfriend so obviously a nice guy.
Like the Hangover, the new boyfriend should’ve been relegated to the Heather Graham spot. Look good and don’t say much. And here’s the biggest tease in the whole movie (spoiler alert). They finally decide to go to Las Vegas, just as the movie starts to slump and…
They never get there. WTF?! Besides the fact the reason they never get there is so completely contrived, that’s exactly what this movie needed. Watch the trailer and see how misleading it is:
Now does that sound like they will NOT end up in Vegas? Some of the lines in this trailer didn’t even make the movie. And note how often Covey and Klemper are in the trailer. They have a couple of good scenes, but it’s mostly Wiig and the cop character who falls in love with her. Boring.
Now, in the movie’s defense, I could hear on the other side of the theater, a group of women laughing hysterically. Maybe it strikes a cord with you ladies. The Missus was mostly bored. Perhaps if the trailer had been more honest, my expectations wouldn’t have been so high for hilariousness. (Although then, I probably would’ve skipped it.)
Suck it Hollywood. I give Bridesmaids 4 out of 10 keggers. (You ladies might give it more like a 6.) Bros, you have been warned.
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