Super Frat - Drink Beer, Get Laid, Fight Crime!

Apr29

Ten Movies That Should Never Be Musicals

by tonyd on April 29, 2013 at 12:01 am

Rocky is apparently headed for Broadway and is now going to be a musical. I can’t think of anything worse than mush-mouth Slyvester Stallone trying to sing his lines, unless you made musicals out of these.

1. 2012 (probably the worst movie ever, stands to reason would be the worst musical ever)

2. Quantum of Solace (or for that matter, even a good James Bond movie)

3. Deliverance (includes a song sung by a hillbilly rapist)

4. The X-Files Movie (although it would probably make the overall movie better)

5. Any Tom Cruise movie (but only if he sings this song)

6. Jurassic Park (including guys in dino suits walking and singing, sorta like the Lion King only the animals eat you)

7. Planet of the Apes (oh, wait, that’s been done.)

8. Cujo

9. Any Star Trek Movie (if only to finally put an end to the franchise forever)

10. The Human Centipede (and it’s hit soundtrack song, “Stuck in the Middle with You“)

└ Tags: 2012, Cujo, Deliverance, James Bond, Jurassic Park, movies, musicals, Planet of the Apes, Quantum of Solace, Star Trek, Stuck in the Middle with You, Super Frat, Ten Movies That Should Never Be Musicals, Ten Things You'll Never See, The Human Centipede, The X-Files movie, Tom Cruise, Tony DiGerolamo

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Apr28

Your Fratoscope: April 28, 2013

by tonyd on April 28, 2013 at 12:01 am

If your birthday is this week: You will be the oldest “kid” every to have a birthday at Chuck E. Cheese, but the youngest one to go home with hot restaurant manager.

Aries: You will see what you think is the seventh sign of the apocalypse, but it turns out your roommate murdered a flock of pigeons in your living room.

Taurus: The stars say, shave off all the hair on your body…or don’t. Seriously, the stars don’t care.

Gemini: Your cat will hide your socks. He’s been fucking with you for weeks.

Lemini: You won’t have to worry about that blood you coughed up. Turns out, that’s natural when you’ve been stabbed in throat.

Cancer: Your monkey will run up your cable bill watching HBO demand.

Leo: After drinking beer all week, you discover that you have a problem. You’re out of beer.

Virgo: Some astronauts will stop by your house and try to sell you on a raffle to make money for a new Space Shuttle.

Libra: You will be forced to abandon some underwear on a date. You might not want to fart quite so freely next time.

Scorpio: You will discover that your Chinese tattoo says, “Overpriced whore”.

Sagittarius: Your imaginary butler goes on strike.

Capricorn: Your microwave burrito will gain sentience and you’ll discover just how tasty sentience is on a burrito.

Aquarius: This week, someone will borrow your butt cheek pants and return them without washing.

Pisces: You will discover that it’s the models that get nude at an art class, not the students.