Bros! Take heed! Your pledgemaster may be majoring in “undeclared” and he may have been fired from his brewery internship for “continuous intoxication”, but he sits in judgement of what’s Fratty and Not!
The Supreme Court: Finally Fratty
Oh, can I finally use the cellphone without the cops just randomly taking it? I think any 8th grader that passed Civics could’ve ruled on that, but hey, at least we got some good news on that front.
Twitter Verified Accounts: Not Fratty
If anyone can get a verified account, what’s the point? William Shatner knows the deal and you don’t mess with Kirk. Kirk always wins, bros!
Nigerian pop singer Adokiye: Fratty
Holy shit! This chick offered to give up her virginity to save girls from terrorists. Jeez, most the coeds on Ryesmore give it up for a six pack.
Military Smoking Ban: Not Fratty
Look, I don’t like smoking, but Jesus Christ! If anyone needs cigarettes, it’s soldiers! After being shot at all day in an unwinnable war, you can’t have a smoke? Do we really want guys with .50 caliber machineguns on edge? Are you fucking insane?!
Drone Pilots: Slightly Less Not Fratty
I’m not a big fan of flying death robots, but using it to peek on naked women? Well, at least they weren’t killing anyone.
Electric Harley: Kind of Fratty
Okay, so maybe you don’t get the rumble. But shit, gas prices are high bros and an electric motorcycle sounds pretty sweet to me. I mean, I can still be badass right? I’m sure I can still split my head open like Gary Busey. Well, not me specifically, because of my powers, but you can.
Russian Cops: Not Fratty
Who is a fan of any cops? But shit, at least the female cops in Russia were kind of hot. Now they can’t wear short skirts? WTF Russia? There’s only two days out of the year they can even wear that shit!
The Hash Harriers: Very Fratty
These guys run and drink. I’m not a huge fan of physical exercise, but if I were to do it, it would definitely be with this crew. Hell, I may start my own non-running branch of this club soon!