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Jun14

Twitter in Focus: Anthony Hopkins

by tonyd on June 14, 2017 at 12:01 am

Hey Bros!

Welcome to Twitter in Focus where media comes to die!  Today’s contestant is fava bean eater and Norse God, Anthony Hopkins.  Let’s see what he’s tweeting.

@AnthonyHopkins

March 28th:  “Having a great time at #cinemacon with @michaelbay for @transformers in #lasvegas”

Does Michael Bay travel with his own lens flare?

March 29th:  “Thank you Paramount #BellagioHotel #LasVegas #CinemaCon #MichaelBay #Transformers”

That must be one swanky hotel if a movie star is tweeting about it.

April 5th:  “This is life, not a rehearsal. #lightenthefuckup” http://www.mensjournal.com/entertainment/articles/life-advice-from-anthony-hopkins-w463343

Ha!  Nice!

April 10th:  “#JeffMitchumGalleries #LasVegas #BellagioHotel #MGMGrand #AnthonyHopkinsArt” https://pbs.twimg.com/media/C9EWb3zUQAAoHLj.jpg:large

He’s really into art.  I always picture him a Renaissance Man.

April 12th:  “#artstudio #jeffmitchumgalleries #havingfun”

Cool painting, bro!

April 22nd:  “Endless summer #southerncalifornia #malibu #dreams”

Must be nice.  L.A. with money!

April 24th:  “#AnthonyHopkinsArt #JeffMitchumGalleries”

Note to self.  Write script where Anthony Hopkins is a famous painter…that hunts vampires.  Ooo, he kills the vampires and turns them into art!

April 25th:  “The most powerful, most courageous part of oneself that one can experience is to totally accept everything. Accept life as it is.”

Inspiring.  Even better when you read it in his voice.

April 26th:  “RIP my friend. #JonathanDemme”

That was a huge bummer.  So many talented people have passed away these last two years.

May 2nd:  “#malibu #dreamscapes #anthonyhopkinsart.com”

Wow, nice view.

May 6th:  “My friend, @AaronTuckerArt is a terrific artist.”

Kinda like Jackson Pollack.

May 9th:  “Grateful for the guidance and encouragement. #BerniceEvans #ArtTeacher #NationalTeachersDay #DreamscapesArtBook”

Nice sketch.

May 14th:  “In loving memory of Muriel Hopkins. #HappyMothersDay”

Aw, nice.

May 18th: “Having fun #Disneyland #California”

This guy never stops.

May 23rd:  “Congratulations @michaelbay. #HandandFootprintCeremony #TCLChineseTheatreImax #Hollywood #LosAngeles”

Does Michael Bay’s star explode every hour on the hour?  It should.

May 29th:  “Thank you, America. #MemorialDay”

This is the classiest Twitter account ever.

May 30th:  “Dreams are free, and so often can have no logical or linear development. For me they contain a deep form of rebellion against reality.”

He is infinitely quotable.

Okay, let’s rate AH.  Wow, class all the way.  I give him an 8 for Mustness, an 9 for Insanity (because you have to be a little crazy to be an artist) and a 10 for Style.  That’s an overall score of 9, but I’m bumping it to 10.  You have to follow Sir Anthony.

And if you have a suggestion for Twitter in Focus, email me here.

 

 

└ Tags: actor, Anthony Hopkins, art, Bellagio Hotel, hotel, Las Vegas, Michael Bay, Mother's Day, painter, Paramount, star, Super Frat, Tony DiGerolamo, tweet, Twitter, Twitter in Focus, vampires, Walk of Fame
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Jun12

Fratty or Not Fratty with Pledgemaster Dick

by tonyd on June 12, 2017 at 12:01 am

It’s time for you pledgemaster to pass out, then wake up later and judge!  He shall judge all!  This is Fratty or Not Fratty with Pledgemaster Dick!

 

The Mike Tyson Mysterious:  Very Fratty

If you haven’t seen this show, it’s amazing.  It’s on Adult Swim and stars Mike Tyson with Norm MacDonald as one of his pigeons.  It’s like an old Hanna-Barbera cartoon, only really messed up.  Can’t get enough of it.

The Word Manspreading:  Not Fratty

That’s the dumbest fucking word I’ve ever heard.  Ranks right up there with “mansplaining”.

Adam West:  The Frattiest

Adam West might be the Frattiest guy that ever lived.

Anti-Protest Laws:  Very Not Fratty

Bro, they’re arresting people that didn’t even do anything.  They were just there.  WTF?

Puerto Rico:  Fratty

Puerto Rico is finally going to be a state.  It’s about friggin’ time.

Decker: Unclassified:  Not Fratty

I guess I don’t get the metahumor shows.  I mean, I get them, I just don’t find them funny.  Making something purposely bad, but try to be serious?  It’s just kinda boring to me.

Trump:  Kinda Fratty

Look, I know he’s an asshole and he’s done some messed up stuff, but—  You got admit, the guy is nuts.  He just crashed a wedding in NJ.  The guy likes to party, you gotta give him that.  I mean, I’m sick of hearing about him, but—  Look, I’m torn about this.  Let’s just say, he’s a little Fratty.

Faking Illness to get out of Bar tab:  Genius!

I have to try this.

└ Tags: Adam West, Anti-protest laws, bar tab, comedy, Decker: Unclassified, fratty, Fratty or Not Fratty, funny, humor, Manspreading, meta, not fratty, Pledgemaster Dick, Puerto Rico, Super Frat, The Mike Tyson Mysteries, Tony DiGerolamo, Trump
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Jun11

Your Fratoscope: June 11, 2017

by tonyd on June 11, 2017 at 12:01 am

FratoScopeHeader

If your birthday is this week:  Your cake will be glazed in the tears of your enemies, just like Conan.

Aries:  You will somehow jack knife your VW Beetle.

Taurus:  You’ll shock everyone at the miniature golf course by sinking several holes-in-one without pants.

Gemini:  A policeman will ticket you, mostly because he’s just bored.

Lemini:  This week, you’ll start counting all the slices of bread you eat until you die.

Cancer:  That meat that you’ve been saving in the fridge finally gets up and throws itself out.

Leo:  The strippers at the strip club insist you sit in shadow because it’s too depressing to gyrate around you.

Virgo:  You’ll invent a delicious new cocktail with a horrible name called the Goat Piss Margarita.

Libra:  You will get into another fight over tacos.

Scorpio:  You will expose yourself to some tourists.

Sagittarius:  Your image consultant finally tells you to take the mascot costume off.

Capricorn:  The stars say, global warming sure is cool looking from where the stars are sitting.

Aquarius: You will be challenged to a fight by several small children dressed as the characters from Fight Club.

Pisces:  You’ll drink so much iced tea, you’ll go back in time to the beginning of the week and do it again.

└ Tags: Aquarius, Aries, astrology, bread, Cancer, Capricorn, Cocktail, comedy, Fight Club, frat boy, funny, future, Gemini, global warming, Goat Piss Margarita, horoscope, humor, iced tea, Lemini, Leo, Libra, Mascot, miniature golf, Pisces, prediction, predictions, psychic, Sagittarius, Scorpio, signs, strip club, Super Frat, Taurus, ticket, Tony DiGerolamo, tourists, Virgo, VW Beetle, zodiac
Comments Off on Your Fratoscope: June 11, 2017
Jun10

Ten Things I’d Like to See as Apps

by tonyd on June 10, 2017 at 2:07 am

  1.  An app that negates the sound of babies crying.
  2.  An app that allows you to filter political tweets.
  3.  An app that starts a timer which countdowns how long you have until the commercials are over.
  4.  An app that counts things like the Rainman.
  5.  An app that keeps track of how long you’ve played games on your phone and hectors you to do something more useful with you life.
  6.  An app that allows you to talk through your phone with any foreign accent.
  7.  An app judges when the porn you’re watching is getting too depraved.
  8.  An app that rates your farts by smell, sound and length of time.
  9.  An app that says inspiring things to you at random intervals.
  10.  An app logs all your mistakes and points out when you’re going to repeat one.
└ Tags: Apps, baby crying, comedy, farts, funny, humor, life, mistkaes, political, porn, Rainman, Super Frat, Ten Things I'd Like to See, Tony DiGerolamo
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