Nov30

Twitter in Focus: Jan Michael Vincent

by tonyd on November 30, 2016 at 12:01 am

Holy shit, bros!  This week’s Twitter in Focus is Jan Fucking Michael Vincent!

@Airwolf4Life

November 21st: “I just plunged the fucking toilet with my metal leg. ”

He’s badass even when plunging a toilet!

November 21st:  “I am a to 99% of people on the planet. The other 1% are called “retards” ”

Well, sure, this is proof.

November 21st: “I just loaded up a cart at Wal Mart and walked right out without paying because I’m JMV. #FreeShit #Hollywood”

Who’s gonna stop him? Not me.

November 21st: “Here’s me fresh off another goddamn car wreck. Left the hospital & began filming THAT DAY. #Unstoppable #AllBalls”

Did he stop that car with his face?

November 21st: “These fucking grocery stores better get smart when I roll in to buy booze #JanMichaelFuelPerks”

I think JMV needs a grocery store that has an obstacle course that you have to run to get in and get out.

November 21st: “I love action!”

And tweeting on November 21st apparently.

November 21st: “Now these are fucking graphics”

As badass as a video game from 1991.

November 21st: “When you’re a legend, you can do what you want. The law doesn’t apply to legends like myself”

I don’t know if this twitter account is real, but I really hope it is.

November 22nd: “This country really fucked up not electing me President. #JMV4Prez”

No arguing with that. His box office is better than Trump’s.

November 22nd: “I’m fucking looking into that right now” RE: How much drinking money does Netflix give you for royalties? #freebooze4life

I’m sure you can find a lawyer you can pay in beer.

November 22nd: “I turned down a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame because they wouldn’t put “JMV-Greatest Actor Ever” on it. #FuckThem”

Good for you. What’s the point if you can’t write your own star?

November 22nd: “Got my turkey ready for Thanksgiving. #Legend”

What are you going to stuff that with?

November 22nd: “I go all out for Thanksgiving. Besides the Wild Turkey, I’m getting a few Hamms too. #Serious #Icon #Tuff”

Well, you need side dishes.

November 22nd: “This country really fucked up not electing me President. #JMV4Prez”

You said that.

November 27th: “I just cut the goddamn lawn by flying Airwolf upside-down. #Chopper #Shit #Fuck #hero”

The same way he opens beers.

Okay, let’s rate JMV. I give him a 10 for Style, 8 for Mustness and a 10 for Insanity. That’s an overall score of 9. Follow JMV.

And if you have a suggestion for Twitter in Focus, email me here.

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Nov28

Binge Watch: Search Party

by tonyd on November 28, 2016 at 12:01 am

So I’ve been noticing a lot of new shows on TBS recently.  (American Dad has new episodes on there, btw.)  There’s this new show called Search Party, starring Alia Shawkat (AKA:  Maybe from Arrested Development).

Pitched as a hipster noir TV show, the story centers around Dory (Shawkat) who becomes obsessed with a missing ex-classmate.  Her whiny boyfriend and self-absorbed friends screams Millennials, but in a cartoonish way that doesn’t provide much insight.  I watched the first four episodes and it started to hit its stride by the fourth, but it’s not really all that funny.  Part of the problem is, these are supposed to be fresh-out-of-college kids, but they’re already too successful.  One’s an actor on a TV show, another is an intern that can somehow afford an apartment in Manhattan—-  I think the characters needed to be more broke.

However, it is mildly compelling.  The mystery surrounding her friend and the ineptness of Dory and her crew finally come together with the addition of Ron Livingston.  Without giving it away, his character seems to be some kind of mentor to Dory, but whether or not he’s staying on remains to be seen.

I like that TBS put the entire run of the show on On-Demand.  I’m going to give it two more episodes.

I give Search Party 6 out of 10 keggers.
kegkegkegkegkegkeg

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Nov27

Your Fratoscope: November 27, 2016

by tonyd on November 27, 2016 at 1:41 am

FratoScopeHeader

If your birthday is this week:  The strippers bring out your cake, but ruin the moment when they ask where all your friends are.

Aries:  Your invention of the bacon rocket is delicious, but fails to get a patent.

Taurus:  The stars say, your pile of leaves looks like a giant penis from up there.

Gemini:  The ghost of Fidel Castro will appear to you and demand that you return all his library books.

Lemini:  You’ll realize that the waiter at the Olive Garden gives terrible financial advice.

Cancer:  You’ll accidentally step in a toilet trying to find the gum that fell out of your mouth.

Leo:  Hillary Clinton will steal your newspaper, insisting that it’s full of Russian propaganda.

Virgo:  Your blacksmith will be forced to raise his prices.

Libra:  Your mail order snack arrives six weeks late when you’re not even hungry.

Scorpio:  You spot someone you went to high school with in one of the pornos you’re masturbating to.

Sagittarius:  Your tattoo artist will continue to verify that you don’t understand the Chinese characters being tattooed on your back.

Capricorn:  Your donut maker will conflate vanilla glaze with mayo again.

Aquarius:  Your roommate will pay their half of the rent in Skittles again.

Pisces:  Your turkey leftovers start to turn today, so eat the last 29 pounds of turkey or throw them away.

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Nov26

Frat Boy At the Movies: Dr. Strange

by tonyd on November 26, 2016 at 12:01 am

FratBoyATtheMovies

Hey, bros!  I’m back at the movies for the first time in a looooong time.  But Dr. Strange is definitely something you want to see on the big screen.  Although a lot of those big scenes are in the trailers, there’s plenty more where that came from.

Based on the comic, Dr. Strange is about a medical doctor that becomes a wizard.  Benedict Cumberbatch plays the doctor who begins as a self-absorbed asshole and discovers that it’s not all about him.  Overall, a solid Marvel entry, albeit, a little obscure unless you’re a fan of the comic.  There’s lots of mind-bending action scenes, magic and two after credit sequences.  Dr. Strange will definitely tie into the Avengers, so it should be fun.

I give Dr. Strange 7.5 out of 10 keggers.  A solid entry in the Marvel Universe movies.

kegkegkegkegkegkegkeghalfkeg

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