If your birthday is this week: You will be swindled by a very clever burglar who yells “Surprise!” when you discover him in your apartment on your birthday. By the time you realized that he’s just regifted you your own […] ↓ Read the rest of this entry…
1. Congress Admits Screw Up; Docks Own Pay 2. Celebrity Marriage Totally Stable 3. Economy Completely Unchanged From Yesterday 4. Gas Companies Create Week Long Giveaway to Promote Gas 5. CEO Hands $1000 Checks Out to Employees 6. Investigative Reporter […] ↓ Read the rest of this entry…
Toddler Starting Mid-Life Crisis Early Egypt Still Fucked Avatar Planet Discovered Actress Announces Plans to Never Appear in a Tom Cruise Movie Congress Anxious to Bring Shitty Legislation Off-Planet Future Terrorists Promise Not to Shoot Americans With Own Guns Later […] ↓ Read the rest of this entry…
Robot’s Programmer a God Damned Sadist Now People of All Genders, Races and Religions Can be the Most Hated Assholes in the Country Tramp Stamps Not Sexy on Grandmas Governor Likes Football More Than Kids Congress Will Continue to Suck […] ↓ Read the rest of this entry…