Super Frat

Jan20

Frat Boy At the Movies: The Iron Lady

by tonyd on January 20, 2012 at 12:01 am

My personal bias is definitely going to effect this review. First, it is a well made film and Streep is, as always, amazing to watch. I mean, short of plastic surgery, she is Margaret Thatcher.

The movie follows her life, but not in chronological order. It starts with her feeble and old and jumps back and forth in flashback throughout her career. A lot of it centers around her personal life, especially the relationship she had with her husband and dealing with his death.

Part of the movie made me mad, because I’m old enough to remember Margaret Thatcher and I didn’t particularly care for her policies. The other part made me sad because, like the husband character, I too am a goofy guy, married to an English woman (one generation removed).

That being said, there’s no denying that it’s a good movie. I’m not sure how audiences that don’t know their recent English history will take it all in (in the US), but for one of these critically acclaimed, soon-to-be-an-Oscar-winner movies, it packs a lot of emotional punch and doesn’t feel slow at all.

I give the Iron Lady 8 out of 10 keggers, but I’m biased because I don’t like movies that make me sad and angry, so you might like it better. Admittedly, the Missus dragged me to go see it, but I wasn’t disappointed.

└ Tags: cinema, drama, film, Frat Boy at the Movies, history, Meryl Streep, movie, rating, review, Super Frat, The Iron Lady, Tony DiGerolamo

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Jan16

Ten iPhone Apps You’ll Never See

by tonyd on January 16, 2012 at 12:01 am

10: Reality TV Show Crew Detector: This app would buzz whenever you were in the proximity of a reality TV show camera crew, thereby allowing you avoid airing your personal problems across national TV. It’s most popular with wanted fugitives that could end up on Dog: The Bounty Hunter.

9: Taylor Swift Sound Canceler: Using a technology that can negate equal sound frequencies, this app will make sure that you never hear this hot, sultry siren’s music ever again. Can also be retooled to negate Celene Dion.

8: TSA’s Pocket Body Scanner App: Why step in an entire machine, when this app can do the humiliating job of stripping you of all your human dignity with just the push of a button? Warning: Will coat your junk in massive doses of radiation.

7: Porn Hider: Allows you to stream porn on your iPhone, which looks like Bugs Bunny cartoons to anyone not looking directly at the screen. Warning: Must wear your ear buds for this to full function.

6: Internet Back Up Date App: Allows you to place extra dating profiles in your cues with ready-to-go emails. So while your current date is going down in flames, you’ll be well on your way to the next one. With any lucky, you’ll get a response before the waiter brings the check.

5: Douchebag Bar Ratio App: Scans the clothing and hairstyles of everyone inside the current bar you’re standing in, compares them to the Jersey Shore cast and calculates the percentage of douchebags in attendance. Also detects spray tans depending on the lighting conditions.

4: Fake Emergency Text App: Next to end a date early? Tired of talking to that douchebag that bought you a drink? Or maybe you’re just stuck in a boring conversation? Activate this app and 30 seconds later, you’ll get an emergency text that will allow you to exit the room immediately.

3: iColonoscopy: Just buy the overpriced Apple attachment, flush your system of food for 24 hours and save yourself an embarrassing trip to the doctor.

2: Onion Headline Confirmation: Confused about the news? Has some of it become so bad that you cannot tell a real headline from one generated by the Onion comedy newspaper? Worry no longer. With this app, you’ll know if you’re laughing ironically at the demise of the United States or chuckling genuinely at some well-crafted comedy. Warning: This app may depress the shit out of you.

1: Ringer Decoy: Want to take a call or get your text in the movies? This ringer harnesses the power of ventriloquism by throwing the ringer at another patron, so you can take the call while the usher throws out that “rude” man in the third row. How else are you going to see the end of MI4 and not miss where people are meeting later?

└ Tags: App, body scanner, colonoscopy, comedy, dating, douchebag, emergency text, funny, humor, iPhone apps, Jersey Shore, parody, Porn hider, Reality TV, ringer, Super Frat, Taylor Swift, Ten iPhone Apps You'll Never See, Ten Things You'll Never See, The Onion, Tony DiGerolamo, TSA

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Jan15

Your Fratoscope: January 15, 2012

by tonyd on January 15, 2012 at 3:05 am

If your birthday is this week: You will find out your car insurance does not cover accidents with hot dog carts and that you can eat hot dogs right off the ground if you’re hungry enough.

Aries: This week, brace yourself. You’re going to get some astounding news that will change your life or a delicious bagel. Interestingly enough, both have something to do with cream cheese.

Taurus: You will find yourself fishing in your neighbor’s pool, wearing nothing but boxer shorts in 30 degree weathere. And yes, that was some kickass weed.

Gemini: A Jehovah Witness will knock on your door, but when you answer he says, “Oh. Sorry. Not you.”

Lemini: The stars say, a Chinese friend will translate your cool tattoo as “Dumbfuck”.

Cancer: After watching several hours of Japanese Anime, you will feel incredibly dirty. You’ll shower, but it won’t help.

Leo: Your hamburger will arrive well done, with onions. Don’t send it back. Your cook just got served with divorce papers and he has access to way to many knives in the kitchen.

Virgo: You’ll find the perfect pair of shoes on that body they dredge from the lake. It’s not like he’s using them.

Libra: After giving a homeless guy five dollars, you’ll see him get into a limo. Don’t worry, he gives it to the driver as a tip.

Scorpio: You’ll finally seduce a Senator from Florida. Now you’ve done one in every state. Congrats!

Sagittarius: After a drinking binge, you’ll discover that you can fill a wastepaper basket with vomit in about three heaves.

Capricorn: You will meet Steven Segal in a Five Guys. He’ll ask you for the rest of your fries.

Aquarius: This week, a Tibetan monk will reveal the location of your lost Xbox controller. He won’t stay because he has to walk the Earth helping pathetic couch potatoes like yourself.

Pisces: You’ll find that Starbucks will be out of iced lemon pound cake again. God dammit.

└ Tags: Aires, Aquarius, astrology, Cancer, Capricorn, comedy, funny, Gemini, horoscope, humor, Lemini, Leo, Libra, Pisces, Sagittarius, Scorpio, Super Frat, Taurus, Tony DiGerolamo, Virgo, Your Fratoscope, zodiac

1 Comment

Jan14

Frat Boy At the Movies: Mission Impossible Ghost Protocol

by tonyd on January 14, 2012 at 1:48 am

I like to make fun of Tom Cruise movies because sometimes when he’s in a trailer, it’s Cruise overload. MI4 kind of looked that way and I had been turned off the whole franchise after the first one. But what brought me to this one was the director, Brad Bird. There’s no denying this guy’s talent.

That isn’t to say Cruise isn’t good in certain roles. He usually at his best when he’s a jerk, like in Collateral Damage or Rain Man or Magnolia. But unlike a lot of other Cruise action movies, this one felt more like a team rather than War of the Worlds, which came off more like “Tom Cruise vs. the Martians”.

The action scenes, from the opening up until the climax are really well done. And you really get the sense that Ethan Hunt (Cruise) has been put through the ringer in this one. Jeremy Renner, Simon Pegg and Paula Patton also get good scenes, so the movie isn’t overwhelmed by Cruise. Probably the weakest element is the villain, who is just “crazy”. He doesn’t have much personality and isn’t even in the film all that much. There are a few scenes that, when you think about them later, won’t make much sense but these are kept to a minimum.

The politics of it are kept pretty cartoony. In a classic Bond movie, it was easy to just blame in the Soviets. Now, the US is so heavy handed all over the world, it’s military so overly funded, I didn’t really have a problem believe that Ethan and his cohorts could be left an entire cache of computers, weapons and gadgets in a train without the US noticing. Bird plays it smart, making the IMF weaker rather than trying to beef up the villain. It also ties in well to MI3, if you’ve seen that.

Overall, I give the movie 7.5 keggers out of 10. While the plot and villain are standard, everything else is slick and fun. It is what it is, a blockbuster full of eye candy you won’t have to think about. It’s definitely worth seeing in theater. Bird makes full use of the screen.