Hey Bros!
Welcome to Twitter in Focus, where media comes to die. Today contestant is comedian, Eugene Mirman (voice of Gene from Bob’s Burger). Let’s see how hilarious his tweets are and I defy you not to read them in Gene’s voice.
August 1st: “#ThingsThatLeadToSex Watching Law and Order: Criminal Intent nude and high.”
Bung-bung!
August 1st: “#ThingsThatLeadToSex Walking around Brookyln pointing at your boner while trying to hold back tears.”
Wow. Lots of issues in Brooklyn.
August 1st: “The guy at the register just told a guy, “I used to be a part time moil.””
Did he time travel from the 1920’s?
August 2nd: “If aliens came to earth and watched audiences clap as ingredients are added to recipes on TV, they’d probably reconsider invading, right?”
Either that or they’d see if they could distract us with food while they robbed us. With enough sushi, they could.
August 3rd: “How about a sock full of diet pills with every burger? #McDChanging”
That sounds like something Gene would say.
August 3rd: “#ThingsNotToDoDuringAFuneral Connect in a real way with the sadness of the situation.”
Yeah, what’s up with these “relatives” getting so into it?
August 3rd: “So psyched McD’s is replacing beef with grass-fed humans! #McDChanging”
No American for me. I want something lean!
August 6th: “Very soon we’ll find out if Martian Manhunter was real or not.”
Imagined if Curiosity just rolled into his house and found him reading and taking a shit.
August 6th: “Hey NY! Comic & Scrabble wiz @jerkophagus (who did an awesome @WTFpod) has a one-man show debuting at the NY Fringe! http://www.thistooshallsuck.com/#!home/mainPage”
Ooo, the Fringe is a good time.
August 6th: “Li dj vgTi”
Either Eugene dropped his phone or a had a stroke.
16 hours ago: “Putin should put the rocket on trial so no more rockets fail! MT @AP Russian booster rocket fails to put 2 communications satellite in orbit”
Probably too busy taking his shirt off somewhere.
14 hours ago: “Not sure if the woman walking behind me is describing to her son how it feels to kill a chicken or the 1st day of school.”
Could be both. What if he’s going to chicken killing school?
5 hours ago: “Heading to @CelebrateBklyn‘s Prospect Park show with @TheRealYLT Wyatt Cenac and M Ward!”
Nice.
Okay, let’s rate Eugene’s tweets. I think he’s killing it. Solid material, plugs and not even for himself. Would like more behind-the-scenes, but funny stuff. And if you haven’t seen Bob’s Burgers, you should. I give Eugene an 8 for Insanity, a 9 for Mustness and a 10 for Style. That’s an overall score of 9. Follow Eugene, he rocks.
And if you have a suggestion for Twitter in Focus, email us here.
If your birthday is this week: You will see that episode of America Dad you always see. You know the one.
Aries: You finally chat up that chick from your History class. Turns out, she’ll date anyone that can get her some meth.
Taurus: You’ll think the people in Starbucks are trying to get you, but it turns out you’ve just had way too much cappuccino.
Gemini: Your speech will kill at your sales meeting, mostly because your fly will be down.
Lemini: Don’t eat the roasted pig at the BBQ. No one checked it for ticks.
Cancer: You’ll get pulled over by a cop. He won’t give you a ticket, but you will have to read his screenplay.
Leo: Jesus returns to Earth this week and stops by your house, but only to use your bathroom.
Virgo: You will be mugged by a guy in a college football mascot costume.
Libra: You will borrow your roommate’s college football mascot costume.
Scorpio: You will invent a new kind of porn, so rare and so disgusting, that not even you can get off on it.
Sagittarius: Your mailman will insist that everyone on his route has to reach in his pocket to get their mail.
Capricorn: The ghost of JFK will visit your girlfriend and bang the shit out of her.
Aquarius: You’ll finally come out of that alcohol-induced coma from Oktoberfest. Get a beer and celebrate!
Pisces: You will discover that describing your Dungeons & Dragons character makes for poor conversation at your dinner party.
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Black Tail and Marz
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Company Man
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Damn Heroes
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The Hero Business
Hit Girlz
I, Mummy
Java Jaguar
Ker-Bop
Kick Man
Krrobar.com
LaSalle’s Legacy
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Plan C
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SCAPULA
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