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Oct05

Rewritten Headlines: Cookies to Phillippines

by tonyd on October 5, 2012 at 12:01 am

Meaningless Election Judged on Meaningless Criteria

Playing Baseball Too Much Pressure for Adult Man

FBI Forgets Jurisdiction

Economy Still Shitty

Men Love Boobies

Long National Nightmare Slowly Coming to Close

Senator Offers to Spend More Tax Money to Fix Problem He Could Fix by Spending Less

Guys Really Cheap When Horny

Iphone Users Soon to be Lost

Good Morning America to Become Even More Boring

Smart Guy With Edge Over Blathering Dumbass

Former President Viking or Pirate Apparently

└ Tags: Abortion, Ann Romney, baseball, Bill O'Reilly, birth control, boobies, comedy, cookies, Economy, FBI, funny, Good Morning America, humor, Iphone, Jersey Shore, jobs, Jon Stewart, Libya, News, parody, Phillipines, president, Rewritten Headlines, Rewritten News, senator, Super Frat, Tony DiGerolamo, TSA
Comments Off on Rewritten Headlines: Cookies to Phillippines
Oct03

Twitter in Focus: Seth Rogen

by tonyd on October 3, 2012 at 12:01 am

Hey Bros!

Welcome to Twitter in Focus where media comes to die.  Today’s contestant start of film and TV, Seth Rogen.  He’s a funny actor, let’s see if he’s a funny tweeter as well.

@Sethrogen

September 14th:  “Do you love comedy and phone sex?! Go see “For a Good Time Call” this weekend. You will laugh so hard, you will not only pee, you will poop.”

Oh, no.  I’m not having a repeat of what happened in “The Master”.

September 15th:  “Dear Rappers: please stop putting “skits” on your albums. They are not funny and make it hard to play your albums at parties. Thank you.”

How does Seth Rogen not have an iPod?

September 15th:  “NEWSBREAK: Amanda Bynes photographed having most awesome day ever”

Hey as long as you’re having an awesome day in your head, who are we to judge?

September 15th:  “I think in order to run for president, you have to have a first name I’ve never fucking heard in my life.”

Don’t say that.  That could mean Reince Priebus could be next.

September 17th:  “I waste so much time reading the news stories on the Yahoo home page, I’m barely left with enough time to jack off after.”

You should read the porn news.  Saves me tons of time in the morning.

September 17th:  “I don’t know what terrible things go on inside Fred Segal, and I don’t want to know.”

I think only you and ten other people can afford to shop there, so bad news for them.

September 18th:  “I’m so desperate for a new episode of Breaking Bad, I’m tempted to watch Malcolm in the Middle.”

Life is unfair…

September 21st:  “Halfway through season one of Game Of Thrones! Shit in King’s Landing has gone straight cray.”

Shit.  Still haven’t watched it yet.  La-lah-lah!  Shut up!  Lalala!

September 22nd:  “Game of Thrones is so good, even though in half the scenes I have no fucking clue what anyone is saying.”

First, I’m going to finish Breaking Bad, then I’ll watch this.  Because while I might have to start selling meth in this economy, it is highly unlikely I will have to fight dragons.

September 22nd:  “See “For A Good Time Call” in theaters now! If you’re a fan of mine, I’m in it! If you hate me, don’t worry, I’m not in it for very long.”

I’ll tell you what you were awesome in that was short, that episode of “The League” you did.  Fuckin’ hilarious.

September 22nd:  “My writing/life partner Evan owns @gravytrainLA food truck! Check it out today @stfoodcinema 4 a screening of Superbad w some awesome swag!”

That’s cool.  How does he fit a writing office in that tiny little vehicle with the kitchen and food?

September 23rd:  “These motherfuckers at Ralph’s are trying to sell me sprinkles in grams and ounces. I’m making pancakes! I need to buy sprinkles in weight.”

God damn, motherfuckers!  You come back East, hit me up.  I’ll connect you with my sprinkles guy.

September 23rd:  “Can’t wait to see “The Master”. It’ll be so cool to finally see what it’s like for Joaquin Pheonix to play an unstable weirdo.”

Dude, he’s on a whole new level of weird in it.  It’s pretty awesome.

September 23rd:  “Watch @davekrumholtz on #Partners tomorrow night, Sept 24th, 8:30/7:30c on CBS. It’s his funniest role since “Addams Family Values”!”

Can’t tell if you’re being sarcastic with that one.

September 26th:  “I convinced myself that not only is it okay to smoke weed on Yom Kippur, I’m actually MORE repentant because of how hard it is to fast.”

No wonder I haven’t see you in a movie in a while.

Okay, let’s rate Seth’s tweets.  I gotta say, top notch.  Off the cuff, seems genuine, good mix of life stuff, behind the scenes and a few plugs.  I give him a 9 for Insanity, an 8 for Mustness and a 9 for Style.  That’s an overall score of 8.6.  Seth is one to follow.  Especially since there’s a good chance he’ll get high and tweet something really crazy.

And if you have a suggestion for Twitter in Focus, email us here.

└ Tags: actor, Breaking Bad, comedian, comedy, For a Good Time Call, funny, Game of Thrones, get high, humor, movie star, Seth Rogen, Super Frat, televsion, Tony DiGerolamo, tweet, Twitter, Twitter in Focus, weed
1 Comment
Oct01

Ten Searches You’ll Never See on Google Trends

by tonyd on October 1, 2012 at 1:46 am

1.  “Bring back Alcatraz TV Show”

2.  “Arizona Cardinals”

3.  “where to buy pus”

4.  “Obama Romney Make Out Session”

5.  “Photos of Royal Family Completely Clothed”

6.  “Fox News absolutely correct”

7.  “Henry Kissinger’s boobs”

8.  “Lindsay Lohan’s SAT scores”

9. “Yoko Ono music videos”

10.  “App to Rename Penis”

└ Tags: Alcatraz, App, Arizona Cardinals, comedy, Fox News, funny, Google Trends, Henry Kissinger, humor, Lindsay Lohan, list, Obama, pus, Romney, Super Frat, ten, Ten Searches You'll Never See on Google Trends, Ten Things You'll Never See, Tony DiGerolamo, TV, Yoko Ono
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Sep30

Your Fratoscope: September 30, 2012

by tonyd on September 30, 2012 at 12:01 am

If your birthday is this week:  The stars say, that dog you let in isn’t yours.  You don’t have a dog.

Aries:   You will get drunk and take a shit in an instantamatic photo booth.  And you’ll have the pictures to prove it.

Taurus:  Your beer drinking, tailgating party comes to abrupt end when you realize that you’re still driving.

Gemini:  You get home from the video store and realize that you’ve accidentally bought a game called “Borders Books Land 2” by mistake.  That’s probably why it was only a dollar.

Lemini:  The ghost of Eddie will visit you and sing Two Minutes to Midnight.  You’ll comment that not only didn’t you know Eddie was dead, you didn’t know he was ever alive.

Cancer:  Your skin will peel off.  Not all of it.  Just the part on your face.

Leo:  This week, that kitten you flushed down the toilet will return for his revenge.

Virgo:  You give up gambling again.  Probably because you’ve lost all your money.

Libra:  You discover why your cab driver doesn’t speak English and won’t take you anywhere, you’ve jumped in the back seat of some random foreigner’s car.

Scorpio:  Your art jam devolves into an orgy and then, shockingly, into a Simpsons watching party.  Maybe you’re getting too old for art jams.

Sagittarius:  Your discount wine tasting tour takes you on a tour of some of the East Coast’s worst prisons and best toilet wine.

Capricorn:  The bad news is, you are being followed, the good news is the guy following you will completely distract the serial killer that’s be stalking you.

Aquarius:  You will discover a finger in your TV dinner, but it’s the last one and you are really hungry.

Pisces:  The boss from TV’s Bewitched will appear in your kitchen and demand to know how to return to the 70’s.

└ Tags: Aquarius, Aries, astrology, Bewitched, Cancer, Capricorn, comedy, funny, Gemini, horscope, humor, Lemini, Leo, Libra, Pisces, predictions, Sagittarius, Scorpio, signs, Super Frat, Taurus, Tony DiGerolamo, Virgo, Your Fratoscope, zodiac
Comments Off on Your Fratoscope: September 30, 2012
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