Your Fratoscope: April 10, 2016
on April 10, 2016 at 12:32 am
If your birthday is this week: Your birthday cake will have three typos.
Aries: Your robot gains sentience and ruins your credit score.
Taurus: The stars say, that’s not glaze on your donut.
Gemini: You will be punched by the next person at your front door, so pray for girl scouts.
Lemini: Your gambling problem will cured by your horrible heroin addiction.
Cancer: Your ninja room makes throwing stars out of your Nickelback CD’s.
Leo: This week, your baker will make you a racist scone.
Virgo: You will discover a way to work creampuffs into your crossfit.
Libra: You will accidentally register as a Republican and immediately get a check for $5000.
Scorpio: You will develop a sensual app.
Sagittarius: Your roommate will insist that you can only drink the bottom half of the milk.
Capricorn: Batman will save you during the mini mart robbery, but insist you buy him a hotdog.
Aquarius: You will have a flashback to that atomic wedgie you got in 4th grade.
Pisces: Your diet makes you weep when you walk past the new cupcake store.
