SF Tony Avatar

You know, I thought Donald Trump would be the only source of comedy this election, but Ben Carson’s recent “revelation” about pyramids is really giving him a run for the money.  Here now are the other ten things I expect Ben Carson to say.

  1. “Illegal aliens are sneaking across the border to get our donated blood!”
  2. “Liberals shot JFK from the grassy knoll using diversity hire assassins!”
  3. “Ronald Regan’s ghost call me one of the good blacks!”
  4. “I will make Israel the 51st state and then promote it to the first state!”
  5. “I promise never to flash gang signs during a State of the Union address!”
  6. “I will institute a zombie apocalypse plan of action within the first two weeks in office or just after the end of the Walking Dead, Season Seven.”
  7. “I promise vitamin supplements for every public school student!”
  8. “I’m not actually a people surgeon, I’m a tree surgeon.”
  9. “I will not host SNL, but I will host Ancient Aliens in 2016!”
  10. “I promise to promote Agents Scully and Mulder so they can get to the bottom of the pyramid mystery!”