Ingredients:  Hamburger patties, cheese, bun

Step 1:  Get really high.

Step 2:  Get really hungry.

Step 3:  Try to order cheeseburger over phone, get shut down by the operator working for “the man”.

Step 4:  Vow to start burger revolution, beginning with your cheeseburger, not like the hamburger from last time.

Step 5:  Go into fridge, find hamburger patties and cheese for this weekend’s barbecue.  Place everything on counter.

Step 6:  Find rolls, pull one out and accidentally drop the rest of the bag on the floor.  Scoop rolls back up and assume “no one will know” despite the fact the floor is filthy.

Step 7:  Turn on stove.

Step 8:  Look for pan, find nug of really good dank in between two old frying pans.

Step 9:  Return to bong to smoke dank.

Step 10:  Realize “dank” is actually a piece of old bacon.

Step 11:  Find actual weed, get high again.

Step 12:  Walk into kitchen to get water, remember stove and burger revolution.

Step 13:  Make giant burger out of one pound of ground meat, place on hot pan.

Step 14:  Realize giant burger will not fit on bun, begin scooping out meat with spatula.

Step 15:  Drop meat on floor, put back in package in fridge and assume “no one will know” despite the fact the floor is filthy.

Step 16:  Eat a piece of cheese and place several pieces on burger remnants.

Step 17:  Flip over unstable, crumbling burger, burn cheese.

Step 18:  Cover with more cheese.

Step 19:  Eat some cheese.

Step 20:  Realize all you really wanted was some cheese.

Step 21:  Eat some more cheese.

Step 22:  Realize pan is very hot, place in freezer to cool and assume “no one will know” despite the fact the freezer is filthy.

Step 23:  Eat bun and cheese, one in each hand, never realizing you could just make a cheese sandwich.

Step 24:  Go to bed with the rest of the cheese.

Step 25:  Get up for barbecue next day.

Step 26:  Get hamburger from bros, bite into it and realize it tastes like floor.