Super Frat

Hey Bros:

Welcome to Twitter in Focus, where media comes to die.  Today’s contestant has it all, boobs, Hollywood connections…boobs.  She writes scripts and works in Hollywood reporting on writing scripts, say hello to ScriptGirl and let’s check out the tweets.

June 20th, 4:24am:  “Just home from seeing Year One at the Grove. Quite vexed with Harold Ramis and Jack Black right now.”

I feel ya, ScriptGirl.  I feel ya.

June 20th, 4:57am: “what’s the deal with Cheesecake Factory? Didn’t their cheesecake used to taste much better? and what’s with my vaguely Seinfeldian syntax?”

Maybe they stopped filling it with butter, deep frying it in lard and coating it in sugar.

June 20th, 1:16pm: “Check this video out — ScriptGirl Report 06.20.09 http://bit.ly/OHiEq”

I don’t know what you said.  I just keep seeing stripes bent in the middle.

June 20th, 9:08pm: “Going to the Kirk Douglas in Culver City tonight for some rockin’ and rollin’ and what not.”Easy SG, he’s an old man!

June 21st, 2:29pm: “http://twitpic.com/80wky – 6.20 thumb is a damning gauge of my photoshop skills. 1 hour to add lousy milk mustache!”

Don’t worry, I’m not looking at your thumb.

June 21st, 2:30pm: “In retrospect probably not the best gag to include on Father’s Day. My dad’s Air Force not Amish! http://bit.ly/OHiEq”

Hey, don’t insult the 413th Horse and BuggyAirborne.  If we’re ever attacked by the 19th century, those guys are going to be right on top of it.

June 22nd, 7:30pm: “I watch as much reality junk as the next schmo but J&K+8 does nothing for me. as a selfish only child, 7 siblings is an abhorrent notion!”

Hmm, insight.  Does being an only child make you selfish?  Does having multiple siblings make you generous?  Do I detect some kind of mild guilt in that tweet?  Interesting.

June 22nd, 7:39pm: “You’ll find a god in every golden cloister / And if you’re lucky then the god’s a she- quoth Murray Head.Why’s that song stuck in my brain?”

Whoa, had to wiki for that reference.

June 24th, 8:32pm:  “Prepare my couch trousers! Planning to go home and watch Kubrick night on Turner Classics while gorging on kettle corn. Feed me, Mandrake!”

Just so long as it isn’t Eyes Wide Shut, I’m with you.

June 24th, 9:25pm: “i get all giddy and jabbery with joy at the end of every work day. does that mean I hate my job?”

No, that just means you have one.

June 26th, 11:26pm: “spending my follow friday night editing, photoshopping Don Simpson into a speedo, and eating a stale nutri-system pizza! Want to know more?!”

Yes, mostly what you’re wearing, followed by a webcam show.

June 26th, 11:47pm: “I’m from Buenos Aires and I say kill ’em all!”

Whoa, do I detect the funk of self-loathing?  Hmm, she really is a writer.

June 26th, 11:49pm: “Service Guarantees Citizenship! oh did I mention Starship Troopers is on in the background. ^-^”

Feh.  Never could get into Heinlien’s psuedo-fascism.

June 27th, 6:48am: “Shhhh. Los Angeles is sleeping.”

Los Angeles doesn’t sleep.  It just doesn’t return your calls for 8 hours.

June 27th, 8:43pm: “Check this video out — ScriptGirl Report 06.27.09 http://bit.ly/1562hh”

Listening to the news of what movies Hollywood is developing confirms that there is no God.

June 27th, 7:42pm: “Ha! Countless millions in gross participation won’t shield you from my stinging barbs, Mike Bay! http://bit.ly/1562hh”

C’mon, why pick on Michael Bay.  Oh, wait.  We just did that.  I still love his Verizon  commercial.  He’s got a sense of humor about himself, that’s for sure.

June 28th, 3:51pm: “Sure I went dozens of dollars overbudget on this one…but every penny is up on that screen!! ;) http://bit.ly/1562hh”

Okay, okay.  We got the link.  Don’t oversell me.

June 28th, 3:57pm: “Off to walk dogs on the beach.Should you see a young woman being dragged to her death by 2 rambunctious lab mixes at VB, be sure to say hi!”

Maybe you should get tinier dogs.  Like this one.

You could put him in your pocket!

July 3rd, 4:31pm:  “No new report this week, road tripping to spend the 4th soaking in Americana at the world’s oldest rodeo! See you on Whiskey Row, Pardners.”

Who wants to see old men lasso cows?

15 hours ago:  “Godspeed Robert McNamara. You tried to help us learn from your mistakes.Too bad the Bushies weren’t big on Errol Morris docs.”

Yeah, but Monday morning quarterbacking is easy when it doesn’t endanger your job and your pension.  Another opinion says…

Okay, time to rate ScriptGirl. I give her an 8 for Style (those funbags are pretty stylish), a 9 for Mustness (she updates pretty regularily) and 7 for Insanity (you have to be pretty nuts to work in Hollywood).  That’s an overall score of 8.  If you have a contestant for Twitter in Focus, email us here.