Rich Guys Think Poor People Eat Too Much

Organization That Used to Torture and Run Planet, Decides to be Nicer Now That It’s Nearly Irrelevant

Coffee Drinkers Now Defenseless

Dead Rapper Continues to Have Career

No Farts on Mars

Iranians Really Dislike Cats

E-Readers Stink

Christmas Going to Be Weird for British Parking Authority

Another Rich Guy Goes Free

Swedes Jizzing Everywhere Now