Super Frat

We’re back with another Rewritten News cast!  Less tact, more news!

Real: Teens “Cinnamon Challenge” Dangerous: Not Innocent

Rewritten: Least Dangerous Thing Teens Do Moved to Top of List for Week

Real: Megan Fox Knows She’s Goregeous

Rewritten:  Attractive Woman Owns Mirror

Real:  $7 Billion Public-Private Plan in Chicago Aims to Fix Transit, Schools and Parks

Rewritten:  Chicago Mafia to Get Huge Bailout

Real:  Google’s Self-Driving Car Takes Blind Man to Taco Bell

Rewritten:  Self-Driving Car Hates Handicapped Man

Real:  Game of Thrones Returns on a Truly Epic Scale

Rewritten:  Geeks Renew HBO Subscriptions

Real:  Record Mega Millions Jackpot Sets Off Ticket Buying Frenzy

Rewritten:  99% Desperately Want to Join 1%

Real:  Apple Supplier in China Pledges Big Labor Changes

Rewritten:  Chinese Labor Camp to Tighten Security

Real:   Chinese Firm Surpasses Exxon as No. 1 in Oil Production

Rewritten:  Americans Losing World While Watching American Idol

Real:  Billions of Potentially Habitable Planets Discovered in the Milky Way

Rewritten:  Cantina Scene in Star Wars Closer to Reality

Real:  Two Studies Point to Common Pesticides as Culprit in Declining Bee Colonies

Rewritten:  World’s Ecosystem Severely Damaged Because of Your Fucking Lawn

Real: Stay Class Anchorman Fans, Part 2 is Coming

Rewritten: Actor Who Plays Same Guy in Every Movie, Decides on Same Title