Jul02
Ten Things I Expect an Escaped Orangutan to do at Busch Gardens
on July 2, 2016 at 12:01 am
Recently an Orangutan escaped it’s cage at Busch Gardens. Here now are the Ten Things I Expect he’d do.
- Wonder why everyone runs away screaming.
- Destroy every copy of Every Which Way But Loose.
- See if the funnel cake guy would start him a tab.
- Ride the log flume! Wheeeee!
- Put on hat found on the ground, try to act human.
- Get some peanuts, throw them at the orangutan he hates.
- Find a phone, see if a lawyer could get him out longer.
- Play milk bottle game to see if monkey-strength makes a difference.
- Take a poop in a stall in privacy for once.
- Carjack Tesla, tell it to drive him back to the jungle.
