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Now that Game of Thrones is back, but the books are done, the TV writers have taken over.  The show is now paced more like a regular TV show, unfortunately.  Here now are ten other things I expect from the new season of Game of Thrones.

  1. Guest star, Danny DeVito introduced as new king with a foot fetish.
  2. Product placement of plushies based on main characters.
  3. Texting prompt to vote whether or not a character will die horribly.
  4. Spinoff show on Animal Planet to focus on nothing but dragons.
  5. Tyrion Lannister to drink nothing but Diet Coke.
  6. New credit sequence featuring a cover of the theme song by Lil’ Wayne.
  7. PC episode explains all the people who died were actually horrible people.
  8. Characters to say, “Gosh darn it!” whenever something goes wrong.
  9. Crossover with Marvel Comics characters in season finale.
  10. Walking Dead writers brought in to completely destroy show.