Super Frat

Hey Bros!

Welcome to Twitter in Focus, where media comes to die!  Today’s contestant is Dave England from Jackass.  (The guy who shits a lot.)  Let’s see what he’s tweeting.

@daveenglandshit

July 14th:  “VIDEO! Is this normal behavior for a 47 year old cock-asian? ¡ʎɐpɥʇɹıq ʎddɐɥ 5points aka Skater Dave… http://instagram.com/p/qc_SZXqOrb/”

Skaters live to 47?!  Was he in a coma?

July 16th:  “¡snıʇuodsıɹɥɔ@ ʎɐpɥʇɹıq ʎddɐɥ ”

How the fuck do you flip over fonts?!

July 17th:  “Throwback Thursday of my morning. 3am-Noon pic.twitter.com/tL8C6A0EW4”

Just give the penis mushroom an hour to relax.

July 19th:  “My little girl turned 13 today. I don’t know how stoked I am about that! This pic is from 10 years ago. #Ruby ”

Awww.

July 19th:  “The #snakerun jonahcantu has been dreaming about got poured this morning thanks to shanoinsano… http://instagram.com/p/qpQUZKKOtO/”

You’re gonna break some sweet bones in there.

July 20th:  “We will miss you here on Earth, jonahcantu but we know you are now in a much better place.… http://instagram.com/p/qryVFtKOov/”

Oh, shit.  Bummer.

July 22nd:  “¡VIDEO! #Clyde had an allergic reaction to girls this afternoon. #Ojai http://instagram.com/p/qxV6gHqOqI/”

Poor kid.  Well, at least they weren’t talking to him.

July 24th:  “Who hasn’t wondered what #Santa does in the #summertime, right? Well, now you know- he slips into… http://instagram.com/p/q3A4GuKOmI/”

Santa’s workin’ it!

July 25th:  “How hot is Chuck Norris in this leaked Mission Impossible 5 trailer?! Thanks @SamMacaroni http://youtu.be/sLsQC8jpidg”

I’d watch this movie.

July 26th:  “Why does #Instagram always gotta make such a big deal about everything #all the time? @ Instagram’s… http://instagram.com/p/q5mzwJqOiY/”

Hipster pussies.  WTF?

July 27th:  “¡VIDEO! shanoinsano grinding through the #snakerun he made for jonahcantu. #jonahsskatespot #sinatra… http://instagram.com/p/q-KtshqOi1/”

Crazy idea.  Fill that bitch up with water and swim in it!

July 28th:  “One man shits in a bucket while the other forces his chihuahua to touch a severed shark head that has… http://instagram.com/p/rA1P0JqOoR/”

No offense, Dave, but I’m not leaving my good bucket around you.

July 29th:  “How weird is this mistake?! http://tvnz.co.nz/national-news/nz-herald-apologises-fallen-soldier-s-family-over-jackass-photo-blunder-6038967 …”

Someone at the newspaper’s graphic department didn’t get a raise.

4 hours ago:  “Have you ever tried vet yogurt? It’s made from all the sick mommy animals’ milk.”

Wow, you actually made yogurt more gross for me.

Okay, let’s rate Dave’s tweets.  I give him an 8 for Mustness, an 9 for Style and a 10 for Insanity.  That’s an overall score of 9.  You gotta follow Dave.

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