Zombie Outbreak in Early Stages

Politician Nonchalant and Folksy About Beating the Shit Out of Prisoners

Celebrity Gets Balls in Her Face

Unsafe Zoo Sounds Badass

Octopus Spawns Needy Brood

Restaurant for Fatties Still For Fatties

Large Animal Saves Disgusting Trash Bird

How We’re All Gonna Die

Florida Police With Nothing to Do

Nerds Want Money