California is ablaze this week, bros.  So if you live there, turn on your sprinklers at full blast or get the Hell out.  And here’s ten things you probably shouldn’t be doing.

1.  TP a house

2.  Practice your fire juggling

3.  Take your gas canister for a walk

4.  Wear a suit made entirely out of fuses

5.  Open a life-sized, paper map of your state

6.  Leave the door to your firework shack open

7.  Air out your kindling collection

8.  Dispose of your old gunpowder by dumping it out back in the woods

9.  Take your paper mache float for a test drive

10.  Do a test run of your Burning Man, burning man