sf-chris-avatar.jpg  with Chris Moreno

Every Thursday, Chris Moreno lists individuals whose behaviors are so deplorable that they should eat a dick.

— The Boise, Idaho woman, who, in a fit of road rage, threw coins and a bottle of ranch dressing at another driver, and rammed the driver’s car three times in a parking lot, should eat a little ranch dressing herself… from a raging hard-on.

— Aaron Siebers, the dude who cut himself with a knife and made up a story that he was jumped by three men who were either, “Hispanic or skinheads,” just so he could get out of working at the video store, should check out some of the “new releases” from a big ol’ dick.

— South Carolinian, Rodell Vereen (I hope no relation to Ben,) just got 3 years in prison for fucking a woman’s horse– for the SECOND TIME!  Perhaps he can spend his time in jail eating a giant horse dick.  Slow and steady wins the race!

— The Detroit man who bit through a neighbor’s lips after he picked up a football that had accidentally been tossed into his lawn by some teenagers should have no trouble eating a little rumpled-dick-skin.

— The veteran Milwaukee firefighter who drugged his wife’s tea with Lexapro after an argument needs to take a sip from a thick, veiny, meat hose.

Think someone needs to eat a dick? Email suggestions to dicketer@gmail.com or post in the message board.