Super Frat

Crank 2: High Voltage may be the most insane action movie you will ever see.  Directors Mark Neveldine and Brian Taylor (who also wrote the screenplay and did the first movie) heighten the second movie to ridiculous extremes and it is extremely entertaining.   First off, bros, there are titties everywhere in this movie.  I mean everywhere, including Amy Smart’s titties.

Jason Stathman plays Chev Chelios, the hitman that got poisoned in the first one.  Amy plays his stripper/girlfriend, Eve.  Chev fell out of a helicopter at the end of the last movie and this movie picks up right where the other left off.  Scooped up by Chinese gangsters, the Triad decides to harvest Chev’s organs.  (They figure they must be good since he survived their deadliest poison.)  Some three months later, Chev wakes up with a temporary heart, fights his way off the operating table and starts his insane journey to get his heart back.  Also returning is Efren Ramirez as the twin brother of the transvestite killed in the first movie.  Chev’s heart is only temporary and hooked to a battery.  He must keep the battery charged to live and has to constantly shock himself.  Did I mention Amy Smart plays a stripper?  She also kicks Corey Haim’s ass.

There are so many high points in this movie, it’s kind of like spending way too much time getting a lap dance on a roller coaster while getting all coked up.  It’s just a non-stop orgy of violence and sex.  The great thing about the movie is the bar is already set low and the creative team shatter your expectations of what an action movie can be.  They don’t just stick to the high concept.  But even that they explore to the max, having Chev shock himself with every device imaginable just to keep living.

Crank 2 abandons almost all sense, but you probably won’t care because the movie just keeps daring you to stop watching.  (If you do, you’re going to miss something weird and cool.)  The Transporter sequel were missing this kind of fun.  If you’re the kind of person that takes movies seriously, you’ll probably hate this sequel, but I couldn’t turn away and loved almost every minute of it.  Even a scene as boring as Chev and Eve in a police car turns interesting as Eve is trapped in the back with a horny fellow stripper that just won’t leave her alone.  I think about every stunt person in Hollywood must’ve gotten a gig on this movie.  The action rarely stops and when it does, it’s uses replaced by titties and/or interesting cuts, music or sequences.

If you don’t like Crank 2, you probably dislike strippers and GTA IV, so you fuck you then.  I give Crank 2: High Voltage 9 out of 10 keggers.  It is the most kick ass, titty shaking, action flick you will see this summer.