2012
| Feb 7 | Bow Down Before the King of Pink |
| Feb 2 | Bitter Blind Date |
| Jan 31 | How Low Can You Go? |
| Jan 26 | Pleased to Meat You |
| Jan 24 | The Media: You Can’t Explain That |
| Jan 19 | Mama Said Sign My Check |
| Jan 18 | SOPA/PIPA Protest |
| Jan 17 | Fraternity Outreach |
| Jan 12 | Major in Wasting Your Parents Money |
| Jan 10 | Doctor Beer |
| Jan 5 | The Clean Break |
| Jan 3 | Hope…You Don’t Get Indefinitely Detained |
2011
2010
2009
2008
2007
| Dec 21 | But who pays the keg deposit? |
| Dec 14 | Ebay Sells Everything |
| Dec 7 | When It Absolutely, Positively Has to be There |
| Nov 30 | Goth Block |
| Nov 23 | Master Piece-of-Ass Theater Presents: Two for One Deal |
| Nov 16 | Emo Interuptus |
| Nov 9 | A Scary Seven Seconds |
| Nov 2 | And Annunciate |
| Oct 26 | Dumbass |
| Oct 19 | Don’t Try This At Home |
| Oct 12 | Master Piece-of-Ass Theater Presents: The Three Way |
| Oct 5 | Freedom’s Just Another Word Apparently |
| Sep 29 | Art Imitates Jack |
| Sep 22 | So Not Gay |
| Sep 15 | But Where Did He Poop? |
| Sep 8 | The Mark of MPH |
| Sep 1 | You’ve Come A Long Way Baby |
| Aug 26 | Yes, Please |
| Aug 19 | And He Got That On Ebay |
| Aug 12 | Pharaoh Perks |
| Aug 5 | Sealed For Freshness |
| Jul 30 | Walk Like A Something… |
| Jul 23 | Includes Tip |
| Jul 16 | Big Mummy On Campus |
| Jul 9 | The Pyramid Scheme |
| Jul 2 | Egypt über Alles |
| Jun 25 | It’s All About Networking |
| Jun 18 | A Parting of Ways |
| Jun 11 | Egyptian Fire Insurance |
| Jun 4 | Could Be Raining |
| May 27 | A Course in Irony |
| May 20 | Fan Service |
| May 13 | Now That’s What I Call Hazing |
| May 6 | Shred Giza |
2006
| Dec 31 | Can You Hear Me Now? |
| Dec 24 | Sobrietana: Goddess of Temperance |
| Dec 17 | Band Aid Stick Where It Suppose To |
| Dec 8 | The Jackass Cometh |
| Dec 1 | Once You Go Black… |
| Nov 20 | When Niggaz Ruled |
| Nov 13 | Your Beads Can Be Used As A Flotation Device |
| Nov 6 | Priorities |
| Oct 31 | Spring Break Old School |
| Oct 24 | Aim For The Whistle |
| Oct 16 | Spring Break Dick |
| Oct 9 | Unleash the Lesbians of War |
| Oct 2 | Cure For the Common War |
| Sep 26 | That is Soooo Army |
| Sep 20 | Better Them Than Me |
| Sep 4 | All About the Numbers |
| Aug 28 | The Deadly Oboe |
| Aug 21 | The Revolution Will be Sanitized |
| Aug 14 | Controlled Rebellion |
| Aug 7 | Protest Barriers |
| Jul 31 | Organized Dissent |
| Jul 24 | Multi-Tasking |
| Jul 17 | That’s One Way to Recruit |
| Jul 10 | Rage Against the Tool of the Machine |
| Jul 3 | Iraq, Do You? |
| Jun 26 | Enraging the Enemy |
| Jun 19 | It’s Not Your Everyday Slob |
| Jun 12 | Recruiting Dick |
| Jun 5 | An Army of Dumb |
2005
| Dec 31 | Now That’s Team Spirit |
| Dec 24 | Goth Sucks |
| Dec 17 | Dick Hurls |
| Nov 30 | With Great Power Comes Great Boobies |
| Nov 23 | South Padre or Bust |
| Nov 16 | Victory Kegger |
| Nov 9 | The Hitlerstein Twins |
| Nov 2 | Adolfa & Eva |
| Oct 26 | Dick Enraged |
| Oct 19 | Stomped Dick |
| Oct 12 | No Chains Will Hold |
| Oct 5 | Town Ordinance #21 |
| Sep 28 | Lost in Collegetown |
| Sep 21 | There is no “Fuck You” in Team |
| Sep 14 | You’ve Got the Look |
| Sep 7 | A Call to Arms |
| Aug 31 | Emergency Meeting |
| Aug 24 | The Obvious Choice |
| Aug 17 | With Great Power Comes Great Trash Talk |
| Aug 10 | And He Had To Beg For That |
| Aug 3 | Backdoor Shenanigans |
| Jul 26 | Translate This! |
| Jul 19 | Not That There’s Anything Wrong With That |
| Jul 12 | Plausible Deniability |
| Jul 5 | Friendly Fire |
| Jun 29 | The Answer My Friends… |
| Jun 22 | Dean Target |
| Jun 15 | Something From Heaven |
| Jun 8 | To Everything Turd, Turd, Turd |
| Jun 1 | The Turd is the Word |
| May 25 | The Unflushable Mr. Turd |
| May 18 | Revenge of the Turd |
| May 11 | No Turd Unturned |